Chapter 30

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Hidaya

    I snap out of my little flashback and glance back again but he wasn't there. I stand up but Adda holds me back.

"Where are you going?" She asks.

"Uhm...I need to bring a friend in, I'll be right back." I gently pull away and walk out the hall. I look around a bit before my eyes spot him by his car on the phone.

    Is this man seriously about to leave? And why...why does he look nice.

Focus!

My mind brings me back to my senses and I walk over to him.

"You can't seriously be leaving." I fold my arms staring him down.

He turns around and his eyes instantly glue to mine, his gaze softening. "Let me call you right back." He ends the call still making eye contact.  I clear my throat and he looks down like a child caught stealing from the cookie jar.

"Well?" I frown trying to somewhat seem intimidating against his giant figure towering over me.

"I wasn't leaving..." he scratches his forehead. "...I came out to make a call ne, Mubarak got married today and I'm in charge of almost everything..."

I trail off as he continued explaining himself. The pitch black and gold embroider kaftan he was wearing looking crisp against his caramel toned skin, his beard neatly shaved as usual, his hair neatly tucked under his Zanna Bukar a few curls escaping out. His eyebrows a bit low giving him the hunter gaze look as he talked...

"Hidaya?" His voice brings me back to reality from shamelessly checking him out. A smirk forms at the corner of his lips, he knew I was checking him out.

'Astaghfirullah lower your gaze!!!!'  My brain reminds me.

"Okay..." I still try look tough "...why are you here anyway if you have so much wedding duties?" I ask genuinely curious my head titling a bit.

"I couldn't miss your graduation for the world, and you look really beautiful Hidaya, Masha Allah." He flashes that stupidly handsome smile that made my heart leap.

'Girl get yourself together! We still kinda hate him remember?' My brain interrupts yet again.

"I don't want your compliment..." I look down at the purple abaya he got me, as much as I tried to hate it, it was the most beautiful abaya I'd ever owned "...I didn't have any choice. It was either this or a blouse with no skirt." I add with a shrug.

"You still look beautiful, and I'm honored this was amongst your choices." He smiles again and I roll my eyes. "Hidaya I have a lot of explaining to do..."

"No..you really don't." I interrupt nervously. The last thing I wanted on my big day was another rejection.

"No I really have to..." he starts again but I stop him.

"Please Ziyad, I can't take this, whatever this is...you don't have to say anything" I feel myself panicking, I really can't take another rejection. "Look I know you feel like you have to explain yourself or something but you don't! I was not thinking when I said what I said but just let it stay in the past."

A few seconds of silence and eye contact goes by before he heaved a sigh.

"You really think I came all the way here on my cousins big day just to explain about what happened?" He presses his lips together "maybe I am but...I came here because." He looks down.

"Because what?" I ask.

"Because I love you." He manages to spit out before looking at me.

"What?" I exhale feeling myself getting dizzy from confusion.

"I love you Hidaya. Wallahi I always have, I just didn't know how to say it. I was afraid you wouldn't feel the same way but then you did and I was supposed to be happy but I was a coward..I..i...I was a coward and...I di...I didn't own up to my feelings because I was scared of what would happen or that you would change your mind......I was scared you'd push me away so i did that first..."

I put both hands on the side of my head trying to process what he was saying.

"...I was stupid, you're the best thing that has ever happened to me. You don't know how much you mean to me, and I totally understand it if you don't believe me now but please...if there's anything ever say that you'll believe...let it be this, I love you with everything in me. The past month without you felt like drowning, I can not function without you, I need you." He pinches the bridge of his nose.

"Why all this? Why all of a sudden?" I manage to talk.

"Because I can't lose you, I'm willing to lose everything I own if I can have you!" He almost begs.

"How do I know I can trust you?" I squint my eyes somewhat scanning his face that looked too innocent to lie.

"I...I'll do anything...I'll get on my knees if I have to..." he grabs the sides of his babban riga.

"No no wait." I stop him "Ziyad please....I don't know what to do with this information, I don't know....it's hard for me to even process all this.." I feel my voice shaking.

"What's going on? Hidaya I've been looking for you everywhere." Yaya pops up literally out of nowhere.

"I...." I begin but Ziyad beats me to it.

"Yaya Hafiz..." he walks to him "My name is Ziyad Muhammad and I'm deeply crazily in love with your sister, I truly fear for my sanity if I don't marry her. She's the reason I function, the reason behind my smile and my happiness. My name is Ziyad Muhammad, I'll give you all the necessary information you need about me, I need to marry your sister. Yaya hafiz I am asking you, begging you for Hidaya's hand in marriage." He confesses like his life depended on it.

Yaya looks at me dumbfounded unsure of what was going on but I had the same expression on my face too.

"Ziyad, calm down...uhm..." he taps his shoulder. "...meet me at home tomorrow okay? I'll....I'll have to process all this to be honest." Yaya chuckles confusedly.

"Okay..." he nods like a child. "I'm gonna...ahem" he clears his throat and within a second he was back to his calm collected self "...I'm gonna get going, I'll see you tomorrow insha Allah." The two men exchange a handshake and he walks back to his car, glancing at me before he gets in.

     Yaya holds me by the shoulder and pulls me towards the main entrance of the hall. We halt a few steps by the door facing each other.

"What was that?" He asks calmly.

"Wallahi I don't even know, I saw him from the stage and thought he was leaving so I followed him and all that happened." I walk him through it.

"It's okay we'll talk about later at home, let's go finish your graduation okay." He adjusts my cap,holds my hand and we walk inside.

What the heck just happened.....

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