Veronica's Fallacy

7.

-HER-

I couldn't believe I fucked up so incredibly, but I got overwhelmed when I saw him. I shouldn't have run away like that. I should've hidden somewhere and waited to meet the Lord.

Fvck! I had left without meeting the Underlord. I couldn't have fucked it up in a better way. That damned man came to me just at the wrong moment and ruined everything for me. On top of that, Gunner still had my stuff.

I wanted to bang my head against the wall repeatedly for acting stupid tonight. As soon as I left the casino, I caught a cab and went home immediately, even though my rational side urged me to go back there and at least meet the Lord.

However, now that I knew that my mate was in there, I wanted to avoid that place like it was the epicentre of a plague. I was never going there, but at the same time, meeting the Lord was important.

Fiona wouldn't hear about any of my excuses the next time she called me for a meeting. Thinking about Fiona just made my nerves worse. I was drenched in cold sweat, and my heart was beating a thousand miles per hour. No matter what I did, I couldn't calm down.

I spent the rest of the night pacing in my apartment, unable to calm down. My brain was acting worse— constantly replaying how the man had downed my drink all in one go and looked so fucking alluring while doing something as simple as that.

I groaned and tried to push it out of my head, but if anything, I ended up focusing more on it. That place was the last place I had ever imagined meeting my mate. It had been such a random thing that it knocked my senses out of me, shook me from the inside and awakened me to this misery.

Every wolf dreamed of having a mate one day, but that was not the case with me. I never wanted a mate. I hated the idea of mates. Just because two people turned out to be biologically compatible didn't mean that they had to fvck each other. It was a bunch of nonsense I had no interest in participating in, and also because nothing was as permanent as they claimed the bond to be.

I knew this to be true because of my past. Being mates didn't mean shit, and after growing up in such a rough environment, I knew better. I had decided from very early on that I wouldn't participate in all this nonsense even if I found my mate.

However, it was easier said than done because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't help but wonder about him frequently. I didn't know his name, what he did for a living, or why he was there. A part of me was curious to know all those things.

Was he there to meet someone? I wouldn't say I liked how that made me feel, even though I had decided I didn't want to do anything with him. It was in my best interest and also a good thing that I removed myself from there before I could find out more about him and let my feelings get involved.

My wolf wasn't happy with all this, though. She wanted me to go back to the club, find him out, and apologize to him for abandoning him in such a way. Fvck all that. I didn't care about it— that's what I tried telling myself repeatedly.

On the other hand, I might have pissed off the Lord by leaving abruptly. This was another thing that wasn't making it any easier for me. I had gotten myself into some deep shit, but I felt too overwhelmed by everything to come up with a solution.

I tried resting in the early morning but kept tossing in bed, unable to find even a second of peace. My brain was still in overdrive, and my heart was palpitating in my chest. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't calm down.

I contemplated calling Matt to discuss this mess but then dropped the idea. Matt helped me occasionally, but he was also my contender. I didn't want to make myself seem incompetent by discussing this colossal mess-that'd be foolish.

Some things were better kept to oneself, but if anything, this made me feel worse. It meant that I had to figure something out by myself. This realization made me feel like I had been left at the bottom of a dried well in the desert while no one was looking for me. I needed to get out of the well myself or die there.

Fvck this shit!

I wish there were a way to end this. I could always resign, but then what would I do with myself? I had made work my life. I'd go mad in a couple of days if I resigned, and it wasn't like Fiona would let me quit so quickly, especially after she had spent so much time making my life worse.

I realized I was cornered. I had no choice but to face the situation... or run away. Nah, that wouldn't work. The council would find me somehow, and that wouldn't end well.

So what could I do?

I didn't know. For now, I decided to mope for a bit. I needed to gather myself and act soon. I needed to prepare because I was going back there soon. I could always pretend that I never ran away. I could pretend that it was an emergency. I groaned.

The night was going to be tough.

~

vote. comment. share. follow me

Read the next 20+ chapters on Patreon. Click on my bio's "support me" button to get there.

thanks for reading<3