Heart in Sapphire and Gold

Arabella

As expected, Margaret's church wedding was exceptionally beautiful and the caliber of people present was enough to make sweat trickle down my forehead. Not many people paid attention to me and I did everything in my power to remain invincible. Which was the complete opposite of what I and Margaret had planned to do on each other's wedding day. I sat at the middle row while my best friend and her groom exchanged vows. I had seen him a few times in the past, he wasn't overly handsome but his pocket was and that was all that mattered.

'Such a beautiful wedding'. My mom voiced out while wiping tears from her eyes. 'Yours will be even better'.

I decided to ignore the comment, doubting my mother will be pleased to hear I had given up on thoughts of marriage years ago.
After the scandal, I realized the thought of another person having so much control over you was dangerous. A mistake I would never make again. The asshole that leaked the tape was just a boyfriend then and he was the devil's first born. I couldn't imagine vowing myself to another...forever.

The church wedding ended quickly and the celebration moved to the reception. More guests came, high and mighty, certain A list celebrities were there too, people I once associated with when all was rosy, until it wasn't anymore and they kicked me to the side. It seemed like everybody that was anybody was there. Even reporters were present as well as more cameramen.

Normally, such weddings would have been made private but I guess Margaret was able to influence her father into letting her have such a big wedding.

My family were given special seats at the front of the hall and I due to shame, refused to join them and sat at the back unnoticed. This was the only way I could prevent attention. Or maybe I was just being extremely full of myself and no one cared much about me anyway to even notice I was there. Still, I felt like a bother.

Eventually, the fun began and as time went by, it became clear that I wasn't being delusional. People had indeed noticed I was present. Some seemed uncomfortable, some looked angry, others looked relieved and then a few had mixture of curiosity, pity and shock on their faces. I avoided the eyes of anyone as much I could but I could feel their stares on me, seeping through my pores.

A few people walked over to Margaret, whispering in her ear while staring at me. When Margaret's eyes met mine and it reflected a look of pity, I got up to leave. As I pivoted towards the door, a figure stood in my path. The scent, a gentle breeze of calm, forced me to look up at the most intense gaze. I never knew Lysander Lennox was capable of such seriousness. In his presence, there's a quiet strength, like a comforting whisper that wraps around you. It feels safe, like being in the arms of someone who holds a powerful yet gentle charm.

The feeling was not what I had expected upon seeing him again. Our first encounter a few days ago left me feeling the exact same way. He had grown, and he was more handsome. Or maybe he had always being this way, I had paid little to no attention to him before.

Lysander stared for a few seconds, his gaze not leaving mine. Perhaps if this was a romance movie, it will be the scene when the two lovers realize they've always had affection for each other while soft calm music plays in the background. But seeing as this was reality, I quickly lowered my gaze at him and took a step back. Nice try universe.

'You're in my way'. I simply stated. As much as I hated to admit, his stare made me feel comfortable which was the opposite of how I felt for years. Men usually gazed at every part of my body before giving me the most flirtatious smile. It was an indication that they had watched the video and they only saw me as an object of sexual gratification. And it was disgusting.

Lysander did not look at me like that. He looked at me like a normal person.

'Were you about to leave?'. A simple question. One I did not feel compelled to answer. Why did he care anyway?

'No, I was going to use the bathroom'.

He gave me a skeptical look before his lips curled up in a boyish, playful smile.

'And my sister said you weren't funny'.

I rolled my eyes at the comment and tried to weave a way past him. He raised a hand to stop me. My fingers brushed his arm and I pulled back immediately. Why did he feel bigger than he appeared?

'Let me through'

'No'.

'Excuse me?'

'Did your isolation time up in the mountains affect your hearing?'

I scoffed at his remark and glared as hard as I could. 'We will draw attention to ourselves, let me go'.

'So?' He asked.

'What do you mean so? Do you know what people will say about you when they see you with me?'

'I wouldn't know what people will say because I don't care. And what's wrong with you? You got a communicable disease?'.

I couldn't tell if he was joking. He stared at me like he was genuinely curious, but there was no way he didn't know. It was everywhere and his family was directly involved in the disappearance of the videos. Was he trying to mock me?

'Lysander, please move'.

'So you actually have one?'

'No I do not!'. I didn't wait for his response, I grabbed my purse and walked past him but I didn't make it further as he reached for my hand again. His hand was on my arm.

His hand was on my arm.

His fingers were touching me.

He was touching me.

'Okay, let's say everyone here is staring at you. Are you really going to give them the satisfaction that they got to you by running away? Why did you come back then? If you're just going to hide away like you did before? We didn't talk much back then but you never let another person make you feel inferior about yourself'.

His words made sense and it did make me feel a bit disappointed in myself for wanting to leave. But it's not like there was much I could do, half of the people in this arena had seen my vagina. It was too embarrassing.

'Its none of your business'. I tell him, this time keeping my face on the ground.

Lysander was quiet for a while then he released my arm. 'Do as you wish'.

When I turned back to him, he was already seated, staring ahead. Why did I feel angry that he gave up so easily? And why did I have this sudden urge to prove him wrong? He probably thinks I'm weak, and a scared little girl. I took one look around the hall, some people were still whispering and staring at me but Lysander's words were beginning to make sense.

A lot of these self righteous people had done worse in secret. And I was betrayed, so it wasn't my fault. I was still Arabella Fitzroy and I was still an amazing artist. Fuck everybody for judging me.

I walked back to my seat which was beside Lysander's. From my periphery, I could see him try to hide a smile. I didn't want to talk, and I wished he would read my mind right now. As though to prove he did, Lysander adjusted himself on his seat and faced me with a smile.

'Red or white wine?'