Golden Alpha

Chapter 16 - Deeper into Darkness

The sun had long since set and the grounds were dark and quiet in contrast to the life that still pulsed inside the Lodge. Charlie found himself pacing the halls from one wing to the next trying to settle the restlessness that stubbornly stayed with him. He stopped suddenly, tilting his head to listen. He heard the familiar sound of Mika's voice and it was oddly soothing, a tether that helped pull him out of his mental turmoil. It sounded like it was coming from the meeting hall and he set off to investigate. As he approached, the scene before him froze him in his tracks.

There she was--the outsider. The source of his frustration, his agitation, his anger. She sat there in the heart of HIS home and her presence ignited his rage all over again. The fact that she'd even been invited in sent a surge of fury through his veins. How DARE she be here? That viper was infiltrating the very sanctuary he'd known his whole life, and was just sitting in the heart of the Lodge like she had every right to be there.

His wolf's snarls echoed in the recesses of his mind, intensifying his rage. With the moon's pull amplifying everything--the tension, the aggression, the urge to protect--it was a battle to keep himself in check as his instincts screamed at him to confront this intruder. He waited and listened, unseen as Dakota spoke with them and he could hardly believe what he was hearing.

Without realizing it, his feet had carried him further into the house, away from the scene in the meeting room. He stopped to lean against a wall, clawing for control, his hands were clenched and his chest felt tight, as if the grip of his anger was a physical force trying to crush the very breath from him. The very idea of her presence here, sharing a cup of tea with Dakota infuriated him. Outsider. Deceiver. Intruder! This was his territory, his pack, HIS home! She had everyone else fooled and lulled into welcoming her in with open arms.

He.

Knew.

Better.

He needed to be somewhere else. Ducking out of the nearest door, he made his way to the Den. It was a small guest cottage that stood apart from the main house, and he had claimed it as his own fortress of solitude. The tranquility of the night surrounded him, but he felt none of it. He fumbled with the cottage door almost frantic to get inside and slam it closed behind him while memories from a long time past were starting to surface unbidden, threatening to drown him. 

Memories of the day his world ended.

As he sank to his knees in the dark of the Den, vivid images flashed in his mind, mercilessly beyond his control. He could see his mother's determined expression, the fire flashing in her eyes as she confronted the stranger. He had been a deceiver who came to the valley with honeyed words of friendship and seeking a place to belong. Charlie had been so naive, trusting him, believing in his false facade. What a fool he had been!

The memories continued their unstoppable march of torment before his mind's eye keeping him trapped as an unwilling spectator, the images coming alive with a clarity that brought the pain back as strong as it was that night. The image of his mother's fire as she desperately fought to protect what the stranger sought to steal, and her tenacity in the face of danger he failed to see had seared a deep brand of shame into his spirit.

----

His heart raced as  he watched his younger self rushing to the scene, alerted by his mother's cries for help. She had fought the stranger valiantly as she tried to prevent him from stealing one of the artifacts from their Pack's collection. He had foolishly believed the talismanic dagger to be the source of their pack's power and he wanted it for himself.

Her voice echoed in Charlie's head, a mixture of anger and desperation. It rang in his ears as she ordered him to get back, to get help.

But Tsali couldn't leave her.

Rushing forward, he was determined to save his mother as she grappled with the stranger. The memory played in his head in excruciatingly slow motion--His mother's eyes widened in shock, then she fell to the floor, the black blade of the dagger in the stranger's hand glistening with her blood. Blood that was spreading in a pool beneath her impossibly fast. By the time Tsali got to her, she was already gone. His gorge rose as he could still smell her blood, feel its warmth soaking into the legs of his jeans, slick on his hands as he knelt by her in desperate denial that the fire in those beautiful eyes had gone out.

His fault. It was his fault she was dead, and his fault her murderer had gotten away.

----

Charlie snapped back into the present. His hands were clenched into fists, his nails digging deeply into his palms. The memory of that day had never faded, the pain never truly healed. It was his fault for not seeing through the stranger's lies and manipulation, for not realizing the danger he posed until it was too late. His mother would still be alive if he hadn't been such a blind, trusting fool.

The emotions that dwelt within him--grief, guilt, anger---were all tangled together in a knot that twisted inside of him like a jagged blade and refused to stay buried. As he let the dark sanctuary of the Den envelop him, the Moon was the only witness to the broken boy who could still feel his mother's blood on his hands.