Until the world falls apart - Fear The Walking Dead

XVII- The Clash of Hearts

After Vernon and his family left, a tense atmosphere settled over the ranch. Disputes and differing opinions became increasingly apparent. Troy, still angry, withdrew often on his own, and between us, frustration grew, even though our personal issues were not yet resolved.

The tension on the ranch heightened, with everyone feeling the weight of difficult choices ahead. Recent events had exposed cracks in the once-unified community. Some debated the next steps, while others sought individual solutions for the uncertain future.

Jeremiah tried to maintain some semblance of order, but reality became challenging to manage. Heated discussions, quarrels over resources, and pervasive fear made the atmosphere heavy.

For my part, I felt torn between all this chaos and the need to resolve issues with Troy. As tensions escalated, I decided to find a moment to talk to him and ease the worries weighing on us.

One evening, after most people had retired, I walked to the Otto's. I needed to find Troy and finally finish the conversation we had started earlier. At the top of the stairs, I headed towards a slightly ajar door, hoping it was Troy's room; otherwise, the situation could become awkward. I knocked softly on the bedroom door before daring to enter. I gently pushed open Troy's bedroom door. Darkness prevailed, only disturbed by the faint glow of a lamp on a nightstand. He sat on his bed, lost in dark thoughts that seemed to consume him. A heavy silence reigned, but I knew it was time to break this stifling atmosphere.

I approached slowly, choosing my words carefully.

-"Troy," I said in a soft voice, breaking the oppressive silence.

He looked up at me, his gaze betraying internal turmoil.

-"Bella, I..."

-"No, Troy, listen. We need to talk," I interrupted, sitting next to him on the bed.

Troy lowered his gaze, as if fearing what I might say. "I know all of this is hard to swallow. The losses, the tough choices, it eats us up from the inside. But ignoring our feelings is like letting the darkness engulf us."

I placed my hand on his shoulder, an attempt at comfort.

"I really want to understand what you're feeling. Not the walls you're trying to build, but what's happening inside. We can't move forward if we don't face our demons, Troy."

He averted his gaze, seeming hesitant.

-"Bella, I feel so lost. Every decision I make brings me back to everything I've lost. I'm afraid of not measuring up, of not being able to protect those who matter to me, of not being able to protect you. Every time I look at you, I see how I thought I'd lose you, and I couldn't protect you from all of it..."

I looked at him with emotions.

-"The fear of not being enough, I think everyone feels it here. But you don't have to carry everything on your shoulders. We're a community; we're here for each other. And for what happened, you saved me, you stayed, and you didn't let go of me for a single second."

Troy sighed, as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.

"But sometimes, Bella, I feel like the only way to survive is to become cold, to become strong at the expense of my emotions."

I took his hand in mine, seeking to establish a connection.

"Strength isn't in stifling your emotions. It's in facing them, using them to grow. You're not weak for feeling, Troy. On the contrary, that's what makes you human."

He looked away, seemingly absorbing my words.

"I don't know how to change, Bella. I always believed this was how I had to be to survive."