Anaxiphilia | Taekook Fanfic

Life holds love's hand and turns every fair into unfair

Life was never fair to anyone, Taehyung always had a firm faith in that. He never believed that life was fair to anyone, it was that one strike that landed on every soul which was present in the world and left it battered and bruised at the end of the day. It was that one change of night and day that came in the life of everyone.

Everyone.

But, he never expected that to be present in Jungkook’s life. Not in his life. Not in the life of the man he loved-

Taehyung shook his head, pulling himself out of the thoughts. He didn't love Jungkook, not anymore. Yes, he loved him. In the past, where all that could define him was his love for Jungkook. His whole definition of existence was the love that he held for Jungkook in his heart. Nothing else.

Jungkook’s love made him, his love formed him, his love assisted him in breathing and going about his days. But, the same love that kept him alive became the only one thing that left him shattered with nothing inside himself once that person was gone.

So, no, he didn't belong to him. Not spiritually and mentally like that. Not even from a single part of his belonged to Jungkook. He didn't love him, not anymore.

History undoubtedly has repeated itself, that part of his assumption about their situation was right.

The claws that tore Taehyung apart that night now pierced through the skin of Jungkook, the tremors that shook off his foundations and left him broken and scattered with no signs of being collected again , now rang through the cores of Jungkook. Every cry that left Taehyung’s mouth that night, every plead, every desperate call for Jungkook to stay, it now escaped from Jungkook’s soul in slow painful whispers.

Whispers. Just whispers. But, unlike Jungkook who couldn't feel the whispers of Taehyung that night, Taehyung had no clue of why he could feel the pleads and calls in that bruising voice of Jungkook in every place inside him.

Every place.

Maybe, Taehyung knew the answer. Maybe, he didn't. But, even if he did, he knew he won't be able to accept that. Ever. After working on himself for all these years, he knew he couldn't just swallow this granite fireball resembling pill of Jungkook still existing somewhere inside him and keeping that once dark corner of his sparking.

He couldn't accept that. He could never accept that.

Getting out of his car once it stopped infront of the gate of his mansion, Taehyung stepped into the living room. His flesh was numb, but something still kept nagging at the back of his head. It was the never ending striking of something harsh right over his skull that kept making dizzying sounds and ringing in the darkness that enveloped his insides.

The dizzying sound that somewhat sounded like the pleads and sobs which had left Jungkook’s mouth just a few minutes back.

Further entering the living room without paying attention to his surroundings, Taehyung had just stepped over the first stair that was gonna lead him to his bedroom when a familiar voice entered his ears,

" Taehyung? " Adam's question rang through the vacant vast living room, and as Taehyung stopped as soon as he heard his voice, the little screechy sound of Adam getting up from the couch and walking towards Taehyung echoed,

" I have been waiting for you for long enough. "

Taehyung shut his eyes close, as his headache intensified and anxiety rolled itself in buckets in the vacant space of his chest and for a second felt to seam up the gaps of his ribs.

Not him. Not Adam. Not at this point where he was already standing at the most lowest point of his life, he couldn't deal with him. Look at him in the eyes with somewhat changed personality as before, cause after coming back from seeing the way Jungkook had broken down and how he had held his bleeding heart infront of him, specially he had practically came after stomping foot over his beating muscle, tattering it even more, Taehyung knew he had lost that part of him that always stood untouchable in front of Adam.