Anaxiphilia | Taekook Fanfic

Honest feelings, Wrong person

Week Later :

A week went by and Jungkook didn't see Taehyung at home. It was like he disappeared into a thin layer of air surrounding his body; too close to his heart but away from him.

He regretted what he said. He deeply regretted it. He never ever wanted to hurt him by pinning over his sexuality. Never. Even he was the first member of their family who Taehyung came out to, and he was the one who gave him a shoulder to cry on when he found out his odd likeness. He always supported him. Always.

It was just in the moment that in the deep urge to punch himself he ended up letting out that urge on Taehyung in the form of his words. He felt disgusted. Too much. He wanted to do nothing but just hit his head against the wall until unconsciousness take over his body so he could save his inner self from the shame.

From the shame that he kissed his brother.

Brother.

Who kisses their brother?

No one does.

So, how could he expect himself to behave like? At this point, he couldn't even blame himself for what he did. He couldn't.

Especially the fact that Taehyung’s calmness, worked like a fuel being added to the rage burning in his veins. He wanted him to shout. Slap him. Yell at him. Scold him. Becuase what he did was wrong. It was absolutely wrong, and Taehyung wasn't supposed to defend it. He wasn't. But he did.

Jungkook couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that he just remained his calm because he didn't want to hurt him. He didn't want to hurt, Jungkook. Why?

Jungkook knew he did wrong and he deserved punishment for that.

And, Taehyung being his Hyung was supposed to scold him.

The whole week, same questions roamed in his head like a mantra.

He was supposed to push me.

He was supposed to scold me.

He was supposed to slap me for doing such a hideous act.

But then, a part of his mind woke up and turned down those questions in one go.

He didn't do anything, because he loves you. 

He couldn't hurt his, Bun.

And Jungkook? He accepted it.

Taehyung was his Hyung. Sometimes, the type of brother who always took his side in front of everyone even when he knew that Jungkook was wrong. He always hid his flaws, never let others know about what he lacked. No one knew about the tears Jungkook shed whenever he failed. He always hid his scars, took care of them and then allowed him to go out.

Doesn't matter if the scars were on his heart or skin. Taehyung always took care of them. Because, he hated the thought of someone else other than him knowing about his weakness, his weak points. He was the only one in Jungkook’s life who kept his weaknesses hidden in the deep deep corner of his heart, so that he himself wouldn't find them to attack Jungkook.

Just as the days passed, the silence which echoed in every corner of their house started to eat up, Jungkook. Not just from outside but from inside too. It started to itch his skin, squeeze his heart whenever he entered and was met by the darkness, indicating that he wasn't back.

He called him. Everyday. But he didn't pick up, which everytime had Jungkook just take his keys and drive towards Jimin’s apartment. He knew he would be there. Because there was no one other than Jimin who Taehyung could believe enough to live with.