𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐌𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝐆𝐀𝐙𝐄 ★Alastor x fem! reader★🥀

Ch. XXXV ✡Tears Of A Silent Heart✡

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THAT NIGHT...
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FOR HOURS, YOU REMAINED LOCKED within your hotel room, sobbing as your arms clutched at the only comfort that was your pillow, tears falling repeatedly down your face, dragging behind them the mascara that stains your face.

You appear like a mess, your eyes bloodshot red and puffy from crying for so long, your head aching as if a hammer made contact with your skull, your chest heaving breathlessly from the waves of anxiety, it was all too much to bear.

Your father used to say that no matter the current situation, you are always in control of how you react and feel, how you perceive a problem or error in your way.

Right now, if under different circumstances, you wouldn't be crying like this.
You would inhale a breath and reset your emotions before going out to continue on with the bothersome day.

But in the moment of a newfound bitter reality...
you don't want to stop crying...you want to cry for as long as you can, hoping that maybe it'll overtime suffocate you to the point of demise.

What's the point of even living anymore when the only thing that made you truly live is gone?

The look in his eyes...that final stare from across the room, full of betrayal, hurt, wrath...you'll never be able to shake away that memory.
You'll never be able to shake him away.

You could have never predicted you'd end up like this.
Crying over a man. Crying over ALASTOR for Hell's sake.

Your body begins to grow stiff from laying in the same curled up position for so long.

Instinctively, you shift to roll onto your right side, your back against the shut and locked door, purposely separating you from the others, shieldng you away...

There have been a few times where someone's knocked on your door and spoke softly through the wood in hopes you'll listen, but you refused because of multiple reasons.

One, embarrassment over your appearance.
Two, shame for what you did.
Three, it wasn't Alastor behind that door.

You wouldn't get up or stop your sobbing for anyone, not even for Charlie who came knocking outside your door a few hours prior when it became noticeable that you were missing.

Charlie had explained that everything was okay, and that you should come out of your room because she was worried.
And before she had left, she claimed that she forgave you...

Already forgiven, even without you explaining the full truth or giving out your pathetic justified reason as to why you did what you did.

Charlie's heart is much too soft for such a damned place like Hell...much too kind for the sharp clawed demons that dwell.

A girl like her shouldn't even exist in such a place.
But in darkness, a light is born, as in the light...darkness is born.

It is not one without the other.

Charlie had spoken through the door for almost thirty minutes, receiving no response back from you, until Vaggie had shuffled her way upstairs and led Charlie away to leave you alone.

You could tell it was Vaggie due to Vaggie's lower pitched voice.
And since then, everything has been quiet, still...

Your shadow companion remains by your side, a gentle hollow hand on your back as it rubbed up and down in a comforting manner, though you felt no touch, just the chill hand belonging to the shadow.