T+T - ADDICTED TO YOUR TOUCH

Chapter 4

I could've recognized that laugh anywhere, anytime.

I slowly unlocked the bathroom door and i tried to see if there was really him standing right there or if i was just making things up, again, because i was so delusional.

It was him.

I wasn't ready, why was Timothée Chalamet at a music event? But they invited so many celebrities there that it was necessary to ask him to come there too, maybe with his girlfriend.

He saw me immediately, he was about to knock on the bathroom door to see if someone was in there.

"Oh hi dude!" he said laughing "I didn't expect to see you here!"

It was a music event, i'm a singer, of course i was going to be there.

"Hi! It's so nice to meet you! What are you doing here, like here at the Grammys?"

"Oh i was invited here as a guest, you know, to boost the views or stuff like that...I don't want to talk here, let's go grab a drink"

We walked out the bathroom avoiding the looks of curious people and we grabbed two drinks and took the first sips in the journalists-free area.

"So are you nominated for something? You don't look that excited"

"Mmhhh, yes, best pop dance or stuff like that, but i won't win, i mean, Lana del Rey didn't even win a single grammy, how could i ever win? Instead im totally destroyed by the fact that you didn't get any nomination for Wonka! You delivered an amazing performance!"

I was talking too much.

I sounded like an obsessed fan,and that was basically what i was.

He probably didn't even know we were the same age.

I knew his birthdate, his whole filmography, his favorite movies, his personality type and unfortunately his girlfriend's name.

"Oh don't worry dude! It's not a problem, at the end it was only a silly musical, i didn't expect a nomination even if i wished for one of course."

We were talking about nothing, i wanted to cry because i was wasting all the time i had with him talking about useless surface things, i wanted to have a deep conversation with him.

But maybe that wasn't who he was, maybe he was more of a Kyle from his movie Ladybird than an Elio from his masterpiece Call Me by Your Name.

There was an awkward silence between us and i raised my head to look at him.

He was even more handsome than on my 4K HDR television.

His skin looked as soft as the softest blanket and i wanted to crawl under that blanket and feel cuddled and loved.

His lips were full and perfectly shaped, the type of lips that make every single kiss special and unforgettable.

And his eyes, his eyes were-

He turned around.

His gaze met mine and suddenly i felt like we were the only two people in that huge room.

Shockingly i didn't turn around out of embarrassment and i kept the eye contact.

Shockingly he kept it too.

Suddenly he was mine and i was his, we were bonded by an undefinable connection that was unbreakable, and it felt like we could both die if anyone would interrupt our public but yet so intimate special moment.

I felt an implacable urge to grab his bony hips and abruptly pull him closer to kiss those lips and  to feel like being in heaven, even if kissing meant that we could go to hell.

We could go to hell, but we'd probably be fine.

I was about to second that urge when a jarring ringtone destroyed what felt like the best moment of my short stupid life.

He quickly grabbed his phone and as soon as he read the name "Kylie ❤️" his eyes lost their spark.

"Yes,yes honey i'm coming,i'm sorry" he started screaming into the phone because of how noisy that room was.

It didn't feel as noisy just some moments earlier.

"Dude im so so sorry i have to go,see ya!"

And he ran away.

There was no "us" anymore.

I was lonely again, or maybe i never stopped being lonely.