My Story

Last chapter (for now)

 I immediately felt like this was the right place for me. I felt so comfortable. I mean, I still didn't know anyone, but for some reason, I just felt at home there. I remember a girl telling me to sit next to her. I was happy she wanted to talk to me because I missed a real conversation. She later introduced herself as Kathrin. I really thought this was a good start. The class wasn't all too big and they all seemed friendly. Even the teachers were all very nice. I couldn't wait for the first day of school. I was very excited and looking forward to starting over my life in Germany. There was hope. As time passed the teachers, my classmates, and they all grew on me. Then the pandemic came. We started having school online. At first, I thought it was great. It had already started when I was at my old school, but now it had gotten a lot worse. I didn't mind the lockdown at first. I kind of missed seeing people, but waking up later than usual, and being able to have online classes in my PJ's also was pretty cool. Around nine months later, things were still bad, but at least we could go back to school (using a mask at all times and doing COVID tests every day). Only after a year after the lockdown, did I start to enjoy school. That was a couple of months after 8th grade had started. I was happy. I became friends with Franzi during the lockdown and was so happy to have her as a friend. I tried becoming friends with another girl from my class, but she rejected me. I was kind of sad, but my parents told me to wait for a while. They said that she would come around eventually. Well, she did, but not under the circumstances I was hoping for. Franzi and I slowly became best friends. She was a real friend. Someone I could talk to. Someone, who actually enjoyed my company. Someone who liked having me over, doing presentations and homework, and eating ice cream. Of course, no friendships are perfect, so we had some problems and arguments during the next couple of years, but honestly, I'd be weird, if everything was always perfect between the two of us. Another thing I never thought could possibly happen, happened. I fell in love with a German boy. I didn't even know that was possible. He was cute and friendly and he was different from all the other boys I had met. It's hard to describe, but compared to other guys, also the ones in my class, he was just always very friendly to me. I never knew why. Like every single boy, he too, was kind of annoying ( not that I minded, because at least he was giving me some attention) but boy, did he sometimes get on my nerves. Oh well. Just as I thought things were looking bright on my side, he got a girlfriend. That was very, very sad for me because he was my first crush and my first love. But I was thirteen, so I was very young anyway. A whole year passed and I was so happy with my life. All was good (well, almost everything), I had friends and my life was finally good. When I was in ninth grade, I joined some dance classes and I had so much fun. Franzi danced with a guy from the other class, Finn, and I also danced with a guy from the other class. His name is David. David is a pretty nice guy, but definitely not my type. He had asked me to be his dance partner, and since I didn't have one yet, I agreed. Of course, If I could choose, I would have chosen my crush, but unfortunately, he was already unavailable. Well, in January we had the ball and all of us were looking forward to it. It was a blast! We all had so much fun and we stayed until late (or early, because we left around 00:30). I even danced with other guys, including the guy I liked. Two days later we were going skiing with our classes and that was something I had never done before, so I was pretty excited. That was one of the best weeks of my life! I had no idea, that it was going to be that much fun! Not only that, but I started talking to another girl from my class, Lilita. She was having some problems and didn't have anyone to talk to, so we started talking. And you know what? We never stopped after that. Lilita and I grew very close together and you have no idea how much she helped me. I have no idea what would have happened to me if I didn't have her by my side. At the same time, I helped her and was someone she could talk to, so we had each other. When I said, that we never stopped talking, we actually never did. We were always communicating and met up countless times to talk. After a couple of months, we also had some troubles in our friendship, but I am incredibly grateful, that we stuck together no matter what. It would have broken my heart, if we had gone separate ways... After that, things only went uphill for the both of us and our friendship grew even stronger. She became my BBF (best bro forever). She has been plenty of times at our place and we've had a lot of sleepovers and talks. We even went to a church camp together. That was great as well. We not only grew in our friendship but also in our faith. God was with me when I didn't have anyone. I didn't know that back then, but I know it now. Just like my friendship with Franzi and Lilita only grew, so did my friendship with Marian (aka my crush). By then, he had already broken up with his girlfriend. I was so happy, that we had established a friendship. I couldn't ask for anything else. Summer break rolled around and we had become so close, that we talked(texted) every single day. We started around mid-May with the texting and never stopped. When we had the summer break, we constantly talked, about anything and everything. That is something I sure wasn't going to complain about. So after our holidays, I could say that he had also become a very close friend of mine, if not a best friend too. On the second week of school, we went on a school trip with the other class to Mohnbachtal. It's around an hour from our house. We stayed for three days and it was also quite fun! We even did some archery, so was was quite nice.. We also played a lot of table tennis, like a lot and we had so much fun. The one thing I thought was going to be boring was the hike, but even that was quite okay since we always had someone to talk to. Even though we lost the path a couple of times, we found our way back and that's what mattered. We also played a lot of Uno and it was hilarious, especially when the teachers joined. We were constantly laughing unless, of course, we weren't allowed to make any sounds:P So we had a great time together. We also had plenty of games and devotionals and some worship songs as well.

Fast forward a week... It was a Tuesday, like any Tuesday to be honest and we had school until evening. Lilita and I had been discussing this for some time now, and I finally decided to do it. I wanted to tell Marian how I felt about him. Not gonna lie, that was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do... It was so freakin hard because I was terrified that he wasn't going to want to be friends with me if he didn't feel the same about me. But... I did it. And thankfully he felt the same way about me because otherwise, it would have been awkwarder than awkward. Lol. But yeah, once school had finished, he asked me if I wanted to be his girlfriend and I reluctantly said yes. Just kidding, I wanted to:) So, that was the first time I've ever had a boyfriend. It was a bit scary at first because I had no idea what it even meant to be a girlfriend, but I think as the weeks passed, I've gotten used to the idea. We started dating on August 26th so we were together for five months. I had to break up with him in January, for personal reasons, but that doesn't mean, that my feelings for him will ever change. I have waited since 7th grade, I can wait a couple of more years too... With God's help, we will be able to wait as long as it's necessary.

This is it for now, but it's not the end, because every day is a new day, a new story waiting to be written.