The Impostor [ᴍxᴍ]

Looks Like Love

"Fuck!"

My whole body shakes with the force of that orgasm. When it hits me, I find that I can barely keep myself standing. My legs buckle and threaten to drop both Keisha and I to the floor. She must know that because she's quick to slide off of the wall and onto her own feet. "That was so good," she moans out against my lips. She's not lying. I put my all into it.

This is exactly the kind of release I needed. This time felt so much better than our hook-ups in the past because I just kept seeing Jackson in my mind. I pictured his eyes when I stared into hers. I tasted his lips when I kissed her.

I kept imagining that I was making love to him instead.

That doesn't stop me from feeling guilty about this. The scene from last night's disaster of a date is still fresh in my mind and I thought that having sex with Keisha might help me forget about it all. It worked for a while but now I'm right back where I started just with the additional guilt that while Jackson is probably still upset about everything, I'm fucking this girl like I don't have a care in the world.

As soon as it's over, I just want her to leave.

Keisha heads for the bathroom instead and I already know her next moves from there. She's going to shower, come back out to get dressed, and she'll ask me for some money before she leaves. Thankfully, CJ managed to sell Miguel's watch to some guy he met on the black market. I didn't know the guy personally and I didn't even want to know anything about him. When it comes to things like this... the less you know, the better.

All I needed to know was that he gave us 45K for the thing. That left me with 15 in my pockets to keep me afloat until I could figure out my next move.

I'm feeling a little generous today so I give her 200 when she gets out of the shower. Keisha is so happy, you would think I just gave her the key to the damn city. I accept all of her kisses even though I still feel a little off-put by them. I don't know how many other dudes she's fucking and I didn't want to be kissing them indirectly. Lord forbid I get a cold sore from this bitch.

"You so good to me," she purrs as she reaches down to play with my dick. She's jerking me off under the covers and my little man is standing at attention in a matter of seconds. I don't want to be aroused by this but my body is betraying me. Thankfully, my mind is stronger when I manage to stop her before things escalate any further.

The guilt had already begun to eat away at me and there was no way I was going to repeat this mistake. "I think you should leave," I tell her. As expected, she is instantly offended by it. "Really? You're kicking me out?" Keisha scowls. I'm not in the mood to deal with any drama and so I quickly explain to her that I've got a lot to do today. It's a boldfaced lie. I have absolutely nothing on my agenda except to try to speak with Jackson.

I've been calling his phone all morning but he allows it go to voicemail everytime. It's clear that he's still angry about what went down but all I need is an opportunity to explain myself and it hurts that he won't even give me that. Not that he even owes it to me...

I guess I'm just being selfish by wanting his time but I could care less about that right now. It's only been a day and I'm losing my mind here. I realise that over time, Jackson has slowly become something that I can't live without and I don't care what that makes me. I don't care if it makes me gay or bisexual or even a fucking sapiosexual. I just want him.

Keisha leaves me be and it's not long before CJ shows up to my house. As soon as he arrives, he's asking for my phone to send a message to Jackson but I'm quick to turn down the idea. I just don't want him to see the personal messages between us and get an idea of just how deep I am in this thing with Jax.