{Zhongchili} what doesn't kill me makes me stronger, right?

the monster in me loves the monster in you

Zhongli presses a kiss onto Childe's forehead when he awakens.

He smiles at him sweetly as Childe pulls him closer, putting a leg over Zhongli's and snuggling into his chest. He can't help it, not after about a year dreaming of waking up like this. Not when he's finally brave enough to try.

Zhongli's fingers are in his hair again, as they've been more often than not. Not that Childe's complaining. Zhongli twirls his hair gently around his fingers, scratching lightly at his scalp. He chuckles lightly when a happy sigh escapes Childe's lips.

It feels so much better when he doesn't feel like he's dying.

"Good morning, Childe," says the god. Childe can hear the smile on his lips. The rumble of his voice reverberates through his bones with their proximity. It settles comfortably in his head, warming his soul, and Childe wonders how it would taste to kiss it away.

Gods, he wants to kiss him so badly. He wonders if it would be alright if he did. Zhongli didn't seem to have any qualms about kissing him, so maybe it would be alright.

The thought of it alone makes him feel restless. All of a sudden, Zhongli is much harder to look at.

This was completely unfair. How is Childe supposed to think straight when Zhongli smiles at him like that? If he let him, Childe would kiss those pretty lips all the time, whispering sweet words to him as he did it.

Before Childe can ponder upon it further, Zhongli kisses him again, this time on the cheek.

"Are you feeling well?"

"'M just fine, Zhongli," Childe mumbles. His voice is deeper, a little raspy. "Better than ever."

It's so shockingly vulnerable that it surprises him a little. He's grown used to waking up with no one to hear his morning voice, instead constantly hiding behind his commanding Harbinger voice or alluring diplomat's charm.

His voice now is unfiltered, groggy with sleep. He stops for a moment, spellbound. Childe feels exposed, as if stripped to the core. But as he looks at Zhongli, with his hair down and looking so prettily at Childe, it feels alright.

"Oh? It seems so. Your face has returned to a healthier shade." Another kiss is pressed into his hair before Zhongli smiles at him again. "I'm glad."

The tips of Childe's ears turn bright red at that, and he hides his face against Zhongli. He does feel better. His skin is still a little clammy and his throat is kind of sore, but it's nothing he can't manage by himself.

Despite everything, his heart drops. Soon, Zhongli will realize he doesn't need to take care of him anymore. Soon, Zhongli will leave.

That makes him feel worse than any poison could. He can't imagine going back to the way things used to be: waiting for breaks to see Zhongli, being hyper-aware of his space so he didn't touch him too much, leaving his comforting presence to return to his empty apartment.

Does it really have to be like that?

Childe thinks of the past few days he's spent in Zhongli's company. Maybe if he only asked...

Gods, this was terrifying. Childe has grown so used to the battlefield that he doesn't even get nervous anymore when he almost dies. But when it comes to Zhongli, he finds himself breathless and his heart racing.

"You've been a great help, Zhongli," he mumbles. "I can't thank you enough. But thank you for staying with me."

Would you like to make it forever?

Zhongli hums long and deep in acknowledgment, nuzzling his face into Childe's hair. "Of course. Thank you for allowing me to."

Childe swallows hard. Zhongli is everywhere: his arms around him, his legs between his own, his hand in his hair, and his face so, so, close to his. He's enveloped in his scent, the sweet aroma of candles and Liyue filling his head. Something settles within his soul, as if it knows it's safe with Zhongli.