J͙u͙s͙t͙ F͙o͙r͙ M͙e͙❧ ≠ •°ᵈⁱᵃᵐ°•

• °03° •

It was already late, the sun was hiding from the sky.

I was home alone...

Well... by the way... not at all

Noel stayed here to continue with his studies...

My parents weren't there, and my brother Paul probably went to smoke some herbs at one of his friends' house... like he did every weekend

but that's what matters the least now...

this day was perfect!

I was thinking about him all day, despite fighting the negative voices in my head about not having tidied my room, I was able to lie in my bed with my eyes closed fantasizing about fictional scenarios

I could imagine him tied by his wrists in my bed, to do whatever I wanted with him...

After a while, I took a short nap after feeling heavy on my eyelids...

and when I wake up...

I had a lovely dream!

I dreamed that his golden hair was on my pillow, resting fully in my room. We were lying on my bed, while I pampered her scalp, I caressed her hair until he fell asleep...

Damn it... that felt so real!

I think it was a lucid dream, I really felt like I controlled the will of my dream.

This is so great, I'll write it down in my diary!

Quickly, I grabbed my diary and started searching page by page... And...

...

Oh, right...

I forgot that there are definitely no more free pages in this notebook.

Alright

No problem

I'll ask Noel to buy me a new one at the store.

I left my room and walked slowly down the stairs, trying to be stealthy so as not to cause any creaking from the old wood.

Between the railings of the step, I saw my brother studying with a cup of coffee. He was attentively reading his chemistry book at the kitchen table.

I walked down the remaining steps and approached behind him, and unexpectedly startled him by my presence.

—Fuck, you are really scary!—he exclaimed, clutching his chest.

I asked him nicely to go buy a new notebook for me, but he stopped my words as soon as I mentioned it.

—You're grown up, Liam, mom isn't here to buy you all your retarded adolescent whims. Go alone, here's some money...—commented annoyed, putting his hands in his pockets. He left some bills and a few coins on the table.—ready, there you go, get out, I have to continue with my studies

—No... I can't... I can't, I'm afraid... Mom prohibits it...— I shook my head, while I took the money, scared.

—Mom isn't here to help you, Liam!

Noel pursed his lips and stood up from the chair with a menacing face. He grabbed me by the collar of my shirt tightly and dragged me towards the entrance of the house.

I wanted to get away from him, but I couldn't, he pushed me out and slammed the door behind me.

I had a nervous breakdown for being outside.

I knocked on the door in desperation until I heard him lock it, while he said:

—I won't open it until you learn to go out shopping like a normal boy your age, you're no longer a fucking child...

I pursed my lips in anger and nervously headed out into the darkening street.

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