Sweet Nothing

3

The family sat down for dinner like they always did the first night, Conrad at one head and her mom at the other. Although, it was different. This time, Abigail wasn't sat next to Belly. Now, she was on the opposite side of the table, next to her little brother and across from the girl she couldn't get out of her head.

She was completely zoned out.

"When are you leaving for training camp, man?"

And she's back in.

Conrad was supposed to be playing football at Brown next year, just like she was supposed to be playing soccer at Yale. Unfortunately, she tore her ACL in the State Championships this past year. She was supposed to be able to still play, but after the surgery, her surgeon told her that she wouldn't be able to handle it. Luckily, she'd still be able to attend Yale, she just couldn't play soccer. It took her a second to be okay with it, but she'd made her peace with it.

Conrad could still play. After finding out about their mom's cancer, though, he lost all of his passion and quit. It broke Abigail's heart to see, but it was his life and his decision. She just hoped he knew what he was doing.

Jeremiah stared at his sister, not knowing what to say. Conrad had gone silent. None of them knew how to break the news.

"What? What's with the looks?" Steven looked between the three siblings. Conrad looked away from everyone, shutting down again. Abigail nodded for Jeremiah to break the news.

"Uh, he quit football." Here spoke up awkwardly.

Steven was completely shocked. "Wait, so neither of you are playing in college?"

Belly's head quickly whipped around to look at Abigail. She didn't know yet that Abi had officially let go of the soccer dream. "Soccer?"

"One bad slide tackle and I could obliterate my knee." Abigail shrugged, looking away from the prying eyes.

Taylor looked at her. It wasn't with the same sympathy of everyone else, though. It was a look of...respect? It made her heart soar. Maybe the drama might be worth it?

"Are you kidding, Conrad? I'd kill to play college ball." Steven sighed from the other end of the table.

Susannah quickly jumped in to save her oldest. "He can always change his mind."

Conrad still refused to make eye contact with anyone. "I'm not going to change my mind. I mean, I was going to sit on the bench all season anyways."

Abi smiled sadly at him. That wasn't necessarily true and he knew it, he was just trying to spare his own feelings.

"Well if you're not playing football, what are you going to do all summer?" Laurel spoke up curiously.

Abigail could tell Conrad was miles away now. One reference to the way their life should've been and suddenly Connie was gone. As if he was ripped away. As if the void had taken him.

Abigail was miles away too. For the first time, she felt alone in a room full of people. Her heart raced. If the void could creep in at family dinner, then nothing could keep it at bay. She didn't want it. She had to get rid of it.

But it was there.

Her mother, though she was the cause of Abigail's state of mind, had a knack for distraction. Sometimes it was annoying. Tonight it was welcome.

"Oh, Belly, I almost forgot!" Her mother shot out of her chair."I have a surprise for you and Taylor."

Abi immediately recognized and couldn't stop the, "oh my god," that tumbled out from her lips.