BROKEN WINGS (m. yanderes x reader)

XXX- by your side

Julian wasn't home when (Y/n) opened the door, but that was for the best. She had said goodbye to Aaron and climbed the stairs up to the flat, insides churning at the idea of coming face to face with Julian.

She wouldn't have known how to face him after what had just happened. And she also really needed some time alone to gather her thoughts and calm herself out of her current panicked state.

She couldn't bear to talk to anyone right now. Nor did she want for anyone to see her like this. It was already bad enough for Aaron and Adam to have witnessed her breakdown, she didn't want Julian to see her in such a sorry state too.

Well he had seen her drunk and on the verge of having a mental breakdown already, but (Y/n) didn't want him to know just how much of an emotional trainwreck she was just yet.

Worse, she didn't want to answer potential questions about what was going on and what had her so panicked. Although she knew that if their relationship ever became serious she'd need to have this talk with him at some point.

Not now though.

(Y/n) buried herself under her covers, letting the comfort of her bed swallow her whole and shield her from the world. There was little she could do about her rampant thoughts though, as even in the darkness of her room they still snaked their way in her head.

All these times she had caught sight of Simon she had blamed it on her potential fucked up brain. On some silly hallucinations or tricks of her mind. All this time she had thought that a few meds would make everything better and give her some peace of mind. How naive of her.

Out of all the cities on the map, Simon just had to choose hers, right?

(Y/n) almost found it funny how she had fled her home city in hope of getting away from him, only for him to follow her and torment her again. Because there was no way she could ever get away from Simon, was there? No way for her to escape the memories of what he had done to her.

The thought that Simon had been so close all this time made her sick to her stomach. Worse, the thought that she had actually ran into him multiple times and gaslit herself into thinking she was the problem.

She wanted to punch walls and claw at the world. To scream and kick and cry.

But she couldn't. So she laid in bed and thought of all that could have been if this night hadn't happened. If she hadn't decided to go out with her friends that night, if she hadn't decided to drink and if she hadn't deserted her drink. It had been a minute. But one minute was all it had taken for Simon to slip something in her cup.

And for her life to come crashing down.

Simon would forever stick to her like plague, follow her to every corner of this goddamn Earth and make her life a living hell.

Just yesterday she had been so determined to leave this behind her. To get her life back and stop letting him control her decisions. Now she felt so pathetic for letting him win, for crumbling at the mere sight of him.

But he was standing so close to her. And although (Y/n) liked to think herself strong, there was only so much she could do when faced with the man who had destroyed her life. Unfortunately, controlling her body's reaction to Simon wasn't one of the things she had control over. As much as she had wanted to punch him in the face and bury her fingers in his eye sockets, she had just remained paralysed with fear.

As powerless as that night.

And she was tired of this. Tired of feeling like she'd forever remain a victim, forever prey to those around her. All due to Simon's actions.