What Is This Life?

The beginning

It was during a cold evening in July. I was in a dark cell in the most popular jail of the United Kingdom. I was just sitting in this cheap bed, waiting for the guards to come pick me up. I had to wait for one to two hours before the officers came to see me. They tied my ankles and wrists with handcuffs connected to metal chains. One of the officers looked at me before saying:

- You're going to wear them until we get back from the meeting with the judge to go back here. From now on, try to avoid problems. And don't struggle with the handcuffs to remove them, it's useless without the key. he said

I could tell that was an indication, but I could also tell that he didn't care about my situation. I had heard him say the same thing to other prisoners, but not in the same cold tone of voice. So it was official: he has a problem with me.

When we arrived at the courtyard, I felt several pairs of eyes staring at me. As if I was a monster or a cripple.

- Come and take a seat, Miss Parks. the judge said to me, pointing in front of her with her black pen. I started walking towards a wooden chair in the middle of the room, making noises with my chains. Finally arrived, I sat down.

- SO!  Please decline your identity!  the judge asked me
- My name is Rebecca Parks.  I said before continuing:
- I'm twenty three years old and I'm from Montreal, your Honor.

- Do you know who I am, Miss Parks? she asked me

I smiled, knowing exactly what to say!

- You are Mary-Alice Clive. You are forty-three years old, a judge for nine years now. You have proven that more than a thousand suspects arrested were criminals. Only daughter and no small family of your own. Am I correct? I asked proudly

Miss Clive looked at me, stunned by my answers but eventually nodded.

- Yes, that's right... But how did you know?  she asked me, still stunned

- I did my homework!  I had to know who would take care of my case, right? my smile widened

The judge looked to my right. I did the same.

- Officer, please state your identity to Miss Parks. Clive asked

- My name is Mark Falk, an officer at the United Kingdom Prison for four years now. I'm also in charge of Miss Parks. said Mark

- We are delighted to have a criminal like you, miss! Mary said to me with a disturbing smile

I narrowed my eyes. I got tricked by my ex best friend and my fucking ex future husband! This in no way classifies me as a criminal. Her joke didn't amuse me at all... Mark walked towards me before Alice ordered him:

- Please take Miss Parks back to her cell, we're done for today.  Enjoy your night, Parks!

I nodded before standing up, looking at the officer Falck who was still to my right.

- Ready, Miss? he asked me

- Yes I am! I replied

- Then let's go. he ordered me before starting to walk away at a brisk pace.

Once back in my mini cell, I sat back down on my bed, making it creak as Mark removed the chains that held my joints captive. He stood up, the chains in his hands. His eyes moved to the red marks around my wrists and he sighed.

- Please forgive me if the handcuffs were too tight, Miss Parks. he continued, still with the same cold tone

- Next time, tell me if they crush you or not.  he informed me

- I'll wake you up with your new uniform tomorrow morning.

- Alright. I replied

- Good night, Miss Parks. he wished me

I nodded and lie down on my side, facing the wall. I heard footsteps moving away, becoming quieter. I couldn't sleep for the next three hours or so. I turned so I was on my back, facing the ceiling. I started thinking about the conditions that led me to this hole. I sat down on my bed and sighed deeply before leaning my head against the wall. The tiredness set in after this long time and I ended up falling asleep.

I woke up the next morning, only to find Mark standing in the corner of my cell. I rubbed my eyes with both of my hands. Damn, we don't sleep well in jeans and a fucking bra...

- Good morning, Miss Parks.

My eyes drifted to the square-folded orange uniform he held in his hand. And as if he read my thoughts, he walked towards me and handed me it.

- You are the number two hundred and twenty-five from now on. Put on the uniform so I can take you to the cafeteria.

- I can't go without a uniform? I asked him

- No, you can't.

- Why? I replied

- Simple formality and respect for the rules.  Now put on your uniform.  he ordered me

He is so authoritarian and mysterious, it's a pleasant surprise...

- Are you going to stand there watching me change or...? I asked, a bit confused because he didn't move out of the cell at all since I woke up

- Consider that I have to watch you at all times, so yes.

My jaw practically dropped to the floor when he pronounced these words. I know I'm an inmate but I should at least have some privacy and a bit of dignity!! What kind of prison is this, gosh!

- I'm sorry but I won't put this on before you let me change in peace!!! I said, furious

Mark was still standing there, silent. He looked like he was thinking.

- The door is closed and this...
I turned around to face the wall before continuing:
- This window is covered with small  cylindrical dams! I can't even slide my head between them to escape! I promise you I won't get out of here! I looked at him, waiting for an answer

He sighed deeply and rolled his eyes. What an attitude!!

- Fine... Go ahead... he said

- Turn around!! I ordered him

He turned around, facing the door, his hands in his pockets.

I sighed in relief, turning around too as I started to unbutton my tight jeans and my blouse. And here starts the beginning of this new life...