Kissing, Hugging And Running For My Life
"For the last time, no!" I huffed at Chris, trying to ignore the pitiful way he was clinging onto my arm. "I will not pretend to go out with you just to make your life a little bit more bearable."
"Come on, Becks, for me? This is what best friends do." he pleaded.
"No." Joe decided to leave at this point, closing the office door behind him.
"I'll make you pancakes?"
"No you won't."
"Okay, I won't, but... I'll never confuse you with one of my ex-girlfriends again." he tried half-heartedly. I stomped away from him and looked out of the window. He was suddenly right behind me, his arms snaking around my waist. "Please? It won't be for long."
"No, Chris!" I was too aware of his body pressed against mine.
"A month?" he buried his face in my neck, kissing my skin softly.
"No." I bit my lip.
"What if I told you.." he began in a whisper.
"What?" I swallowed.
"It wouldn't be faking? That I actually want you to be mine, so I can hold your hands and call you my girlfriend?" his voice was steady, almost steady enough that I let myself believe it.
"Liar." I spun around, took his tie in my hand and pulled his face closer to mine so I could stare him in the eyes. "Do that again, and you won't live to see the sunrise."
He laughed softly, ignoring my death threat. He didn't try to move away from me, but pulled me closer, by pulling at my waist, until our bodies were against each other.
"I'm not kidding, Ashford." his voice was barely a whisper, so soft and gentle that I wasn't totally sure he had actually said anything. "I don't know why, but... I like you. Too much."
"I don't know if I should be flattered or insulted." I was beginning to become a bit too comfortable in his arms, so I quickly pushed away from him and lent on the desk in the middle of the room. I felt a lot more at ease here, more able to settle into the alert awareness that I had learnt from my seven years on the job.
"Not quite sure I know, either." he smiled shyly at the ground.
"Listen: I'm shipping out in three hours, I'm not packed, and I was woken up this morning by my annoying partner. I don't have the time, nor the patience, for this."
"I'm telling Chelsea that's the reason, anyway." he grinned, slipping easily back into his normal relaxed personality.
"Whatever." I threw back over my shoulder as I headed for the door. He was suddenly right beside me, but before he could touch me I thrust my hand out and caught him in the stomach, stopping him in his tracks. "Don't."
"I wasn't going to... I was going to do this." He leaned slowly around me until he could capture my face gently in his hands. I knew I should stop him, but I just couldn't make myself; I wanted it too much. He leaned in very slowly, constantly searching my face for signs that I didn't want this. Impatiently, I closed the space between us, pressing my lips roughly to his.
In books and movies, the first kiss is always magical. They feel fireworks, and just immediately know they will be together forever. I could lie, and tell you it was the perfect Hollywood kiss, all soft and warm and caring... but it wasn't. Not at all. It was just lips, and tongues, and the ever-constant nagging in the back of my mind telling me I was doing it wrong, that I wasn't good enough. There were no fireworks, no instant pschcological connections.
But underneath it all, for the first time in my life... there was something. I could tell it was Chris, which should have been weird, but it wasn't... it felt right.
I pulled away, straightening my shirt. He looked breathless, and I felt a small jolt of satisfaction.
"Wow, Becca... you sure know how to please a guy. I have never had a kiss like that before. It made me want so much more..." he came closer, but I stopped him again.
"I have to go. I'm leaving tonight, and I want to talk to Chelsea about the paperwork. Don't call me, don't text me." I instructed briskly.
"But what about that kiss? Didn't it mean anything?" he sounded so sad that I almost crossed the room to comfort him.
"No. It was a mistake, a moment of weakness." I lied. "We can't afford that in this job, it could get us killed. We can't let it happen again."
After leaving the room, I slid down the wall, holding my head in my hands.
What's wrong with me? I yelled internally. I was doing what I always did... running from something that could make me happy. I suppose that when you make a living running for your life, running away just comes naturally.
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Whaaaaaaat? Two uploads in one night? Yup! I felt so bad about taking so long that I just decided to lie here and write for a while. Sorry it's so short. Hope you liked it!
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Til Death Do Us Part
RomanceWhen two secret agents meet in the field, a meaningful friendship blooms. But when friendship turns to love, and love turns to heartache, can either of them face reality and go back to the job they once loved?