adopted by Billie eilish

y/n's apology

*Y/n's pov*

I woke up remembering the incident from yesterday. I still can't believe i said that to Billie. What was i thinking?

I try to get up from my bed. I sit up and look down at my sheets just to see all the blood from my arms and legs last night. I put my hands on my face as i finally woke up enough to fully understand what was going on. The realisation sets in that my clothes and bed sheets were covered in blood and i needed to hide it somehow. So i just put my blanket over the stain hoping it would hide it enough so she wouldn't notice.

I put some fresh clothes on and headed down stairs to apologise for yesterday.

I walk to the living room and see Billie on the couch playing with sharks.
B "oh who's a good boy?" She says to shark in her baby voice.
Y "hey Billie" Billie jumped a little bit as she didn't realise i had walked in the room.
B "hey y/n" she says with a slight smile
B "about yesterday.. I'm sorry for snapping at you like that. I should have validated your feelings and put you first instead of shutting you down like that."

Y "I think I should be the one apologising. I should just let you be in a relationship with Olivia. I'm sorry for swearing at you and going off at you. I don't know what happened I just couldn't control myself any longer. I'm sorry Billie"

B "come here"

And with that she started hugging me tightly. I try to hide the pain of her squeezing my arm where my cuts from yesterday were. Suddenly I could feel my cuts open up again, I feel the blood start to spread onto my hoodie as Billie continues to hug me. The worst thing was, my hoodie was white making the blood stain visible. My heart was now pounding outside of my chest as the moment Billie let go she was going to see the blood stain on me.

She eventually lets go to reveal the massive blood stain. The blood covering her hand. She looks down at her hand and then looks back up at me. She gives me a look of concern as I stand there awkwardly not knowing what to say or do.

B "y/n? What's this?" She says holding up her hand. And then pointing at my sleeve.
Y "uhm- I don't know maybe you accidentally cut yourself?" I say acting stupid.
B "y/n baby what happened?" She says sitting me on the couch.
Y "please don't be mad"
B "I'm not mad baby I promise, just tell me what happened and I'll help you"
Y "i- don't know Billie" I say trying to get the words out whilst trying not to cry.
B "it's okay my love take your time, I'm not going anywhere"
Y "I just couldn't"
B "couldn't what? It's okay baby I'm here for you"
Y "I just can't take it anymore Billie, everything just seems to be really difficult and I can't do it anymore. I can't do it anymore Billie" I say putting my palms in my face whilst I start to cry.

B "you can do it baby. Hurting yourself isn't the answer. Come speak to me and we can sort things out okay? I don't want you to think you are alone in this. There are so many young people like you who are going through the exact same situation as you."

B "can you let me clean your cuts baby?"
I nod my head as she hugs me lightly trying not to hurt me.

She brings me to the bathroom and lifts up my sleeves I could tell by the expression on her face she wasn't expecting it to be this bad.

She starts cleaning my cuts up and bandages them up.

(Hey my lovely people. Sorry I haven't updated I basically have no motivation for anything right now but I'll try to update as much as possible. anyways drink water 😊)