This is how the story ends.

Epilogue

February 14, 2024
I'm currently sitting on the couch by the window, in the house that I grew up in. As I'm writing this, with the winter sun coming through the glass window; glaring at my face, I'm flooded with many thoughts that I have determined, I'm truly healing for good. Last Saturday, I struggled mentally and was nearly close to breaking down. I wanted to relapse. Return to the toxic lies I used to live within my head; restriction. Restriction was my friend, my mentor, my life coach. Telling me... wait no. Persuading me to believe that starving myself was the golden star. Which I was trying so hard to achieve. Little did I know, I only achieved the greatness of harming myself; losing who I was. I was now being controlled by the dogmatic, harmful, soul-crushing principles that reigned in my mind for most of my high school years. When you have no intention of doing any harm, because you are so over-consumed with that belief system you're not doing anything wrong. Soon, the timer will go off and now you see just all the damage, the scars you caused. No bandaid, no repairs will be able to fix all of that damage you caused yourself, and others you so dearly loved. Since this is a very delicate subject, I sometimes wish I could go back and change everything that I did to myself. So that none of this would ever happen, and would become a painful memory, I will always remember. But that's not the case. You only have one life and that's it. I'm now finally seeing the full picture; the view in front of me isn't showing signs of an everlasting storm, not even mankind could end. The range of the view I see now is Impeccable. The white flag is in the distance, swaying against the breeze that spring brings. I finally won the battle, I whispered and then walked back home.