life support

XIV

Kinn pov

"I SAID GO" hia shouted glaring at me angerly
Kim tried to talk but I stopped him
"Its fine, I'm fine" then I left the room in a hurry

"Kinn wait up" Porsche calls out from behind
I turned to see him stopping Infront of me

When he opens his arms, I broke down and fell into it
"He hates me" I sobbed as Porsche rubs my back
Comforting me

I knew it
Tankhun will never forgive me after everything
He refuses to acknowledge me

"He doesn't hate you, he just needs time" Porsche tries to comfort some more but I shook my head and sobs loudly

"Thats just it Porsche, it's over I ruined everything, hia is never going to forgive me" I blurt out hiccuping

I heard Porsche sigh "he will kinn, just give him some time alright I mean look at me, I was furious when I heard chay lied about going to that uni interview thing but I still forgive him"

"Wait you knew how!?!?" I look up to see chay looking at Porsche in shock
Porsche gave him a look "we still need to have a talk about that, but yea I forgive him" he softly said to me
But it wasn't enough
I know I lost my hias trust
I don't deserve to ever be near him

I got up and started walking when Porsche calls out "where you going"
"I'm going on a walk, don't wait up"

I want to run
Run far but I know I can't just leave Porsche behind otherwise chay will have my head

Or I can't take Porsche with me because chay will still have my head
Or what if I can take both with me somewhere far.... nah then Macau would have my head for taking chay away from him and vegas would get mad because I made Macau lose his only source of happiness

I walked until I seemly found myself standing near a river
It looks so nice at this time of night

So nice and calm
I sat down and layed back trying to release my worries

A few Minutes later I heard footsteps coming my way

I lifted my head to see kim, macau and chay heading towards me
"So is this were the loner little brother club is" Chay joke "let us join" he said as the three of them layed down next to me

We had another few moments of silence looking at the stars until kim broke it
"I tried telling hia, but he didn't want to listen, a part of me wonder if he reverted back to his old self with all of his memories from both versions still intact" he spoke turning his head to look at me

On the other side of me, macau made an agreeing noise "it was kinda weird that tankhun acknowledged kim by his childhood nickname, he hasn't called him that in years" Macau said confused
I nodded as I listened to them both

It's true, hia could've reverted back to his old self so that's why he is the way he is
But
What if he really does hate me now

Didn't he hear all the things I said while he was in a coma

His words hurt a lot more than Kim's and vegas's words

Then again tankhun is my older brother and I look up to him so that could be why

I sighed
Then I felt kim scootching closer to me causing me to give him a look
"What it's cold" he defended making me laugh

I look to the other side to see Macau laying on chays arm smiling at him as chay explained the stars in the sky quietly
I'm happy for Macau
At least one thing is going right with the theerapanyakuns

Now the next thing is
How will I ever make hia forgive me