my journal ♡

♡ it could never be like them... ♡

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

i completely understand the obsession towards her.

i completely see why he can't let her go.

I completely get why he chose her.

since she is perfect and he can't find anyone like her.

why would he want to go for anyone else when he has her?

since she is perfect and she cannot be recreated?

why would he want to chase me when he has her?

just one call away.

just one text away.

just one flight away.

i mean, she has everything he could want.

the looks, the smarts, the personality.

she is everything he would want her to be.

she is everything he needs.

no wonder he still loves her.

no wonder he would choose her.

no wonder he will go back to her.

no wonder he prefers her.

i mean, they are probably star-crossed lovers.

somehow, they will find a way back to each other.

like if it were written in a book, they would naturally end up together.

no matter how hard i try to unlock his heart, he will not let me unlock it.

because she already has the key to it.

meanwhile, I still can't get over what he could see in her when I know the true reason deep down in my shattered heart.

it is because she is perfect.

i want to gaslight myself and tell myself that it isn't true.

whatever they had, can never be like me and him.

because it just can't happen.

no matter how hard i try everything.

no matter how hard i recreate everything.

it is so obvious that he still loves her and can't get over her.

when i heard how overprotective he still is, over her and how he isn't a fan of her guy friends.

i wanted to cry myself to sleep, as i still heard her words when she told me that.

because if i made a bunch of friends and i slowly forgot about him, he would let it happen.

but if she slowly forgot about him, he would do the absolute most just for it not to happen.

the fact that he is still waiting for the day that she comes back to him kills me.

because when I hear that, it kills him whenever she talks about her guy's problems to him.

it makes me wanna disappear from the planet because i can easily talk about my guy problems to him.

since he will do anything to help me solve them.

meanwhile, he will do anything to help her get over them.

he would rather be there for her, so she realizes he is the one.

i would rather have him be there for me so he realizes I'm the one.

even when i told him that all i wanted was him at some point.

he wished someone else was telling him that, aka from her or perhaps somebody else.