Love, Always (A Kamijirou Story)

Buried Wounds

(Slight t/w: mentions of sexual assault)
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(Jirou's POV)

Recently, I realized that if I want to fully commit to this relationship with Denki, I can't keep secrets from him anymore. I avoided talking about my last relationship because it made me feel bad, and I didn't want to kill the mood.

But I think it's time I tell him the whole story.

We sat down and talked at his place. I warned him beforehand about the things I was about to tell and that I might not make it through the whole thing without crying.

I'll tell you the same thing I told him.

My ex was the one who asked me out first. We went to the same school, but he was a year older than me. Things started off okay; we went on a few dates until he eventually asked me to be his girlfriend.

I said yes because I thought he was a nice guy. He treated me well in the beginning, but somewhere down the line, he wanted to do things I wasn't ready for.

He wanted me to meet his entire family. He wanted me to move in with him. To both of those things, I told him I wasn't ready. That caused a big argument. He was manipulative. I didn't see it back then.

I thought I loved him. That's why I stayed for so long. I tolerated it, thinking things would get better.

One day, I went over to his place. He said we were just going to have dinner together, but after we ate, he wanted something more. He wanted to have sex.

At first, I was okay with it. I agreed to it. Somewhere in between the foreplay, I told him I wanted him to use protection. He assured me he would, but when I handed it to him, he took it and tossed it on the floor.

Before I could do anything about it, he had me pinned. He used all of his weight to hold me down. I was able to get my hands free, but before I could even fight back, he hit me.

I begged him not to do it.

Please stop

I don't want this

Please, please don't do this

But it was no use.

He forced his way in, shoving my face into the mattress as I cried. If I tried to escape, he just hit me again.

So I took it.

It felt like an eternity waiting for it to be over. I felt detached.

I felt betrayed when it was all over.

"See? That wasn't so bad, was it?" I remember him say.

I wanted to wipe that dumb smile off of his face, but all I could do was cry.

After that night, I knew I had to leave.

When I told him I wanted to break up, he was hysterical. I made a mistake telling him at his house. He physically wouldn't let me leave.

The way he acted that day, it scared me. He was a different person.

It wasn't until I threatened to call the police that he let me leave on my own.

I didn't feel safe for a while. I stayed with my parents until I was able to get the locks on my apartment changed.

That was also part of the reason why I wanted to transfer. I needed to get away.

I needed my friends to help me feel like me again.

I wasn't until I moved here that I realized how broken I was in that relationship.

Denki gave me a really long hug when I finished explaining everything.

"I'm sorry you had to go through that." He says, "Just...don't ever let me meet this guy. He might not walk away alive."

I laughed a little at his remark, but he was being dead serious.

"Thank you for telling me. I know that was probably hard for you to do." He gently squeezes my hand.

I just nod, "Thank you...for listening. I needed to tell you so you could understand why I am the way I am."

After that conversation, Denki seemed a lot more protective over me. I don't mind it, I just wonder what he thinks sometimes.

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(Kaminari's POV)

I almost couldn't believe what Kyouka told me. I couldn't believe that someone would do that to her. I had no idea who this guy was, but right now, he's my number one enemy.

Kyouka and I both had one relationship before we got together. She told me about hers, so I told her about mine. It only seemed right.

"Did you love her?" She asked.

I just shrugged, "I thought I did. But I've never loved anyone like I love you, Kyo."

We both had some unhealed wounds from the past. It's about time we leave them behind all together.

She said I was the only one she told about her ex. She didn't want anyone else to know.

She has trauma from that. I love her more than anything. I want to show her how much she means to me, but I'm in no hurry to get to that point. There are other ways for me to show her.

She gets a little annoyed when I stare at her too much, but in my eyes, she's the most beautiful girl in the world. I can't help it.

I want her to feel safe when she's with me. She trusts me with her heart, so it's my job to take care of it.

I think about her all of the time. Little things I see throughout the day will remind me of her and make me smile.

She has a toothbrush at my place for when she spends the night. Sometimes, she'll decide to stay the night spontaneously, so I let her wear some of my clothes to sleep in. All my clothes are big on her, but she looks adorable either way.

I'm in too deep already. There's no going back. It's all or nothing now.

If we grow old together, I'd use all of my last breath to tell her how much I love her.

I've made my decision. I want to spend the rest of my life with this girl.