Close Yet So Far Away

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Anais was one of those "Once in a lifetime" girls. The one you never forget and gave you so much to remember, one who is so deserving of love and more than what this world offered her and showed. Anais had a light constantly surrounding her, a heart so pure, and a soul so warm you didn't even need to physically near her in order to feel it. And those eyes were everything, anyone could get lost in them. In addition, she had a smile so beautiful, it makes your heart smile on your worst day. Wherever you go in life, you never truly forget that one girl, you'll always say "It should've been her". That was the case for Brianna. She adored everything about Anais and would tell her closest friends so. Brianna would barely call Anais by her real name, to Bri, Anais was "Muffin". While Brianna wished everything could be simple, she found out what she always knew: Even the most beautiful people have scars and those scars that are invisible are sometimes the most visible. This is the beginning.
It was a weekday and the middle of the Fall Semester for college students. Brianna was a freshman working towards her Associates degree in History. She was enrolled in online college courses at the local community college and although the school refund checks were fat, she was employed part-time at Chuck E. Cheese. Anais was a college student as well but on campus and working as well. They'd first started talking on Kik back in 2017, the vibe and energy was undeniable. What started as a friendship soon blossomed into, "Damn, this could be more than a friendship" type shit. However, life happens and communication was lost for a minute until early to late 2020 and that's where our story begins.

Bri was laying down in bed on Facetime with Jandro, her boy bestfriend. Truth be told, he was annoying but she tolerated him. They weren't really talking about much of anything. Anais and Bri were closer than ever. So much that it seemed like old times again, happier times. They were heading somewhere, potentially into more than friendship. Anais brought out something in Bri that she hadn't had in a while; peace and patience. It was a weird feeling but Bri loved it. It was something about Anais's aura and spirit that caused this feeling of peace and patience in Bri, it actually brought her laidback side out. Brianna hadn't even physically been in Anais's prescence yet but everytime they talked it felt like a warm hug, her heart felt right, everything in her world was right and okay. This was the good time.

During the Facetime, another call came through: "Muffin🥰🧁". This was unexpected and random. This was the first time Anais had ever called. "Hold on hold on, I'll call you back!" Bri quickly hung up the call with Jandro and answered Anais's call. The feeling going through Bri's body and heart hearing her voice and seeing her face in full for the first time was everything. They talked for what felt like hours. Even while Bri at a cold snack which was a Lunchables Pizza, the conversation went on. You know what they say, "Sometimes it feels like hours with the right person." At one point in time though, which solidifies this, Brianna looked at Anais the way every girl and anybody would want to be looked at. That night, in that moment, Brianna knew she loved her and had fallen in love with her. After the call, everything seemed fine the day after. But the months that followed, it all fell down. This was the bad time.

Brianna's POV
Anais left ya girl confused. I woke up one morning and everything was done. I was blocked on iMessage, Snapchat, Facebook, even Instagram OF ALL places. At first, I didn't know if something went wrong with her phone, if something went wrong with her and she had no way of telling me or if she was trying to protect me from something. I didn't know. My mind was racing with every thought possible. I think for a long time I was in complete denial because of WHO she was to me. She was my friend. A close friend rather and we were trying to get to somewhere. I loved her and had fallen in love with her personality and her heart. Our bond was strong. We could bounce back from anything because we'd done it before. However this was just different. I kept telling myself, "Nah not Anais. Babygirl ain't even like that foreal. She wouldn't do some shit like this". And I told myself this for months. When you love someone and you still give a damn, you wait for them right? So that's what I did. I waited. And if I even attempted to entertain someone else, it never went anywhere because my heart just wasn't there. Sometimes, I would just scroll through our messages all because I missed her and her presence. Crazy how we lived in the same damn city and never linked. Today would be different though. I went back to Kik, our old stomping grounds to see what the fuck was up. I had my bestfriend Sierra text her and the shit Anais said set me off. So long story short, I told Anais to tell me what she said to my bestfriend to my face and here we are about to meet up for the first time. It sucks Satan's ass that we have to meet like this. At odds with eachother. This is not how I pictured us meeting but here we are. Truth be told though, even though it hurts, I still adored her. Lemme finish this drive though while my favorite song playing.

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