The Summer Moon Was Born To Be Loved

Part 2

o. buoy

If Satoru was forced to use some sort of ocean-related terminology to describe you, he'd say you're a buoy.

You were the marine biology major. (What was the difference between that and oceanography? Satoru had no idea. You explained it to him at least twice though). Because of that, Satoru heard his fair share of marine terminology from you.

Buoys were those floating things at sea, the ones from Finding Nemo that had all the seagulls on it. You said they were guiding posts, gave heads up for reefs or they could be warnings for hazardous zones.

To Satoru, you were like an anchorless buoy that ー no matter how far he sailed ー he could never reach.

i. halocline

You've never felt permanent; not to Satoru.

You sooner felt like one of those quickly formed friendships you thought would last forever only for it to dwindle out as fast as it started. Then that person was just a forgotten name in your contacts list until you're scrolling down and going 'Who the hell is this? Delete' without a second thought.

It was strange.

An oxymoron of the highest degree.

How did someone who was such a constant in his life from the moment you set foot in it simultaneously feel as impermanent as foam on the waves? One minute you were there, the next you weren't. Satoru wasn't sure when the fear of you disappearing entirely crept in.

When those looks started appearing on your face.

All he knew was that it started long before he started sleeping with you and it started long before you left.

One moment you're hanging out ー undoubtedly doing something stupid. Singing the wrong lyrics to a song on the radio, putting Suguru's hair in pigtails, watching María la del Barrio with Utahime who took one Spanish class and made telenovelas her entire personality for a month ー then you'd grow quiet and this far away look would be in your eyes. Satoru never knew where you went in those moments, but it wasn't there.

So he'd do something to anchor you back to land. It didn't have to be much.

A poke to the cheek,

a tickle to your side,

calling out to you,

sometimes he'd even play with your fingers.

It didn't matter what he did as long as you'd blink and grin and go "what's up?" and everything would feel right in the world.

It never would feel right long enough though; the look always came back and the feeling would persist.

When you sang songs in the car.

("I can do it fast or slow, it really doesn't matter, though. 'Cause I'm a pro, what you say? You wanna take me toe to toe? Uh no, dude, I think so," you'd rap Kel's verse flawlessly like you'd rehearsed it for hours. "My style is phat and Immature's got my back on this funky trackー" you pointed at Satoru enthusiastically.

"You want fries with that?" Satoru would point back with way too much passion for a line that went way too hard for what he was actually saying. "Coo coo ca-choo whatcha gonna do?"

Shoko would roll her eyes but she'd still be smiling when Suguru softly brought in the chorus with rhythmic bumps of his head, "watch me do my thing, I like to do my thing, watch me do my thing, everybody sayー"

Your head continued to bump along but you stopped singing along and looked out the window. Satoru remembered he threw his arm around your shoulders loudly belting the rest of the lyrics until you laughed and joined back in.)