Dream

2.

I promised to take him out for some coffee a while ago, I had a free day today so it worked out. I had to move a lot of work for the next day because I kept canceling on him. He arrived right on time but he was worried he was late since I was already there but I had came early so I wouldn't be late. We both ordered an iced americano. We talked a lot about our high school days and how we kept harassing each other for no reason until the last day, he was a bad student and ended up working at an art gallery so he would get more inspiration and tips on his own art and he thinks it was he got fired because now he can just focus on making art. As for me I was the top student, I never hanged out with anyone especially him because he was a trouble maker, I then ended up in med school and then working at the most suspicious plastic surgery clinic known to man kind until I set up my own clinic. Now we are both sitting here. We had completely different lives but for some reason we both knew we weren't happy with the outcome, because next we talked about how he was constantly getting harassed and picked on at that gallery and how his ex had left him right after he lost his job because he wasn't going to be rich again and now all of aunties are trying to marry him off or are commenting on his life style, then I talked about how I was always overworking and cleaning up others messes at my old clinic and how still have no friends nor have I had any romantic partners ever. I couldn't tell him everything just some of the smaller things. But my chest still felt a lot lighter. 

We ended up at my empty apartment having some beer and soju while watching a movie, the alcohol was getting to me but so was his sexiness. He had just showered and I just couldn't stop myself from staring at his handsome face. But I let something slip that ruined my secret for me. "You know Chanwoo I actually liked you since high school. You were just too much of a trouble maker for me to not do anything." He looked confused, I hid my shyness. He lifted my face up, the face of the guy that once again was crying and had a hard time breathing. "Jeong, it's okay." He said with that smile on his face again, the one I always fall for more and more. He pulled in and kissed me. But not in the way I was expecting him to. "Jeonghwan you're so beautiful." I was red, I felt hot, I was nervous but also so happy. I didn't want it to end ever. This simple thing. 

I woke up at 6am once again. Chanwoo was still asleep. I went to make coffee, brush my teeth and do my skincare. He woke up, we drank coffee together but we weren't really talking just giggling and blushing. I then changed and he went back home to do the same thing but we met downstairs in the lobby. He walked me to work and then we said some awkward goodbyes. I got to the office. I just had one surgery to get through today and then I got off so I prepped for it and got through it. It was also the first time someone saw one of my panic attacks. It was my clinics head nurse. She held  my hand, she gave me water and then she told me. "Take a break, you need it." But I didn't I was able to do the surgery. It just keeps happening afterwards. I was fine. She was overreacting. I needed to be okay. I am okay. I got out of work and Chanwoo was there waiting outside, he smiled once again as he saw me, but that smile dropped right after he my puffy face that still had tears streaming down it. "Jeonghwan what's wrong?" He was concerned. "Ummm I just suddenly felt sad after I finished work. I don't know the exact reason. " He just pulled me into a tight hug. "Jeong I know you're struggling with something but I also know I should wait until you tell me." Little did he know he couldn't.  But that promise was something held close to chest. He would wait for me. 

We got back to our homes, I washed my face and drank some water but afterwards just went straight to sleep. I woke up at 4am I had to go to work early to prep for a surgery. I got there and was greeted by a bunch of sleepy nurses anesthesiologists. I drank some coffee while going through the plan once again. Then I got ready. It was going to be a long one which worried me a little but I had to just stay okay for the duration of the surgery, that's it. It was over, I felt fine. I drank some water and ate some snacks in my office. I also rejected every possible plan I could've made today so I would be free for Chanwoo. I finished my work and got ready to leave and then...

Chanwoo was at the door, he was carrying two bags that had a very good scent coming out of them. "So how was the surgery?" I felt happy. "It went really well." He nodded and opened up the food. We ate and talked for hours, I even started my work for the next day because we were at the office for so long. It felt surreal, I felt so happy that I felt miserable knowing it would end soon. Soon wasn't as soon as I thought it would be though, I got to be happy longer than I thought I would. But because of that the pain and misery was ten times worse. I wish I could've just been happier even longer and even more miserable at the end because I wasn't happy for as long as I needed to be. And it wasn't even my fault. But no one told me that. No one told me.