𝐌𝐄𝐃𝐈𝐔𝐌 ✰ 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐛𝐲 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐤

𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐨 - 𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 22
3𝐫𝐝 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧 𝐩𝐨𝐯

trigger warnings
descriptions of panic attacks

— A SMALL LIGHT CAME ON as Sam pointed his phone's flashlight at them, his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes wide, "What the fuck happened?" He had asked and then everything seemed to slip away. Time, light, reality. Everything.

Before Jasper knew it, he and Colby were alone in the dark room, Sam had gone— disappeared? No, he'd gone to do something. He just couldn't remember what.

He swallowed thickly as he tried to calm his beating heart, but it was no use and Colby had let go of his hand or maybe Jasper had pushed himself away? He wasn't sure but there was eyes on him and nothing was grounding him anymore and—

A voice was calling out to him, he couldn't recognize it, it was just more noise in his mind and he couldn't focus on any of it. Why couldn't he focus? Why was his heart beating so fast? He felt his sweaty palms rub against the wood floor and wondered when he'd fallen to the floor, a hand was stretching towards him, he couldn't move his eyes to see who it was so instead he flinched backwards and pushed until he was up against the wall, alone — safe.

But there was still a voice calling out to him, and he just wanted to be left alone while simultaneously craving the presence of someone other than himself. He couldn't make out the words, he felt like his head was deep underwater and everything else just seemed blurry and distant. Slowly the noises he heard began to form into words.

"-ey. Hey." A voice called he still didn't recognize it, "Jasper." It called again, so they were speaking to him? "Breathe for me. Can you do that?" He thinks he shook his head, but couldn't be sure everything felt heavy. "Okay, okay, can I grab your hand?" He shrugged hopelessly, and the person hesitated a moment before reaching for his hand, Jasper fought the urge to jerk away but couldn't help the wince as the person made contact.

They pulled his hand to press up against something, some sort of fabric like a shirt, he could feel the steady thrum of the heartbeat beneath the fabric and skin. "Feel my heartbeat? Yeah, good. I'm gonna breathe in, one, two, three," the person demonstrated and then asked Jasper to do the same, praising him when he managed a fast deep breath.

They continued this process until finally, Jasper felt his mind start to clear, he could make out the familiar shirt his hand was pressed to and recognized it as Colby's. Colby was the one, patient and kind, easing him through the first panic attack Jasper had since he was outed to the world.

Without even realizing, Jasper moved forward into Colby's lap, the man quickly wrapped his hands around his waist and held him close rather than pushing him away. "I'm sorry." Jasper whispered, "I don't know why I freaked out so much."