✔The First Female [Taennie Adaption]

2

"It's alright Jennie". Jin cooed as I went uncontrollably. His voice was low , gentle and as calm as ever.

We were sitting on the couch together in the living room. Alpha Kai and his pack members long gone , thank God. And it seemed that the second they closed the front door I was in tears , bawling so hard Jin had to guide me me to the leather couch because I couldn't see it on my own. I couldn't even explain why I was so distressed. I just kept crying and crying until my eyes felt swollen and sore and my throat ached from the roughness hiccups.

This is why women weren't supposed to be alphas , How I was supposed to lead my pack into battle if I cried pathetically just because some man , some alpha , wasn't my mate ? I was weak . I was pathetic. My parents were right. My pack should shun me. I should hate myself.

I did hate myself.

"I'm never going to find a mate". I whimpered. I keep my face buried in my hands . I'm horrified by my actions but I can't seem to stop myself from this weakness. Even though I know Jin was right next to me , watching me crumble to pieces . I feel so alone , so helpless and so confused.

"He's out there somewhere". Jin said softly. His voice somehow made me feel better and worse all at once. I was so lucky to have such a sensitive and caring second in command. He was always more concerned for me than he was for himself. But , on the other hand , if I was like Alpha Mark , big intimidating and tough , he wouldn't have to see me in such a weak state, he wouldn't have to be kind and gentle. He wouldn't have to watch his leader to fall to shambles. But even those derogatory thoughts didn't make me shut my mouth and get myself together. It made me ramble more.

"Then what do I do if I found him? He's going to over throw my position, he's going to have to. He'll take his rightful place as an alpha and I'll be nothing more than a Luna". As the gears turn in my brain my tears stop and I force myself off the couch, becoming more angry than upset. "I don't want to be a Luna , I was born an alpha and I deserve that title and some other alpha is just going waltz into my pack and take what is mine just because I'm a woman." I hiss. I pace restlessly now , like a caged animal and I fell my wolf wanting to come out. This wasn't fair. This was my pack , my people, my land . No one was going to rule it for me simply because they were a man .

"You know it would take a very strong alpha to overthrow someone with your bloodlines. And maybe they won't want to. They're going to love you so much their heart will ache everytime they see you. They'll just want you to be happy and if that means your both alphas of two separate packs then that's okay." Jin's voice rang true and honest.

But this was easy for him. He had a beautiful mate and wife who loved him. She would do anything for him, but she was one of the Lowest ranking. She didn't have the love of domination and power struggles that alphas did. All she had was a tender husband and a very distraught Luna as a leader."I need to go for a run." I grunted. My skin was itching, my brain was a hurricane and my wolf felt beyond agitated.

"But you were just out for a run." Jin argued. His blue eyes were watching me intently from his position on the couch he was trying to figure out what was going on inside my head and how he could subdue me .

"I have to go." I blurted.

Jin got up off the couch to follow me but I held up my hand to stop him. I couldn't deal with anyone right now , even him. "Stay here , I really just need time to think things through. Go see your wife. Watch the lands, do whatever you want. You can have the rest of the night off ".

Jin paused as if he was about to argue with me more , but I knew what was going on in his head. He was love sick like every other mated werewolf. He cared about me and the pack very deeply, but I was nothing compared to his wife. There was no way he could deny my offer to spend more time with her.