SECRETS AND ALL

Chapter nine ( Alright)

"Assurance is what everyone wants,
What everyone is looking for,
What we always needs."
-M.K

The muffled voices is what awoke me, my eyes shoot open when I smelt the unusual heavenly scent that envelops me.

I blink several time, to register the semi lit room, providing it with manly, homey and comfortable aura, I surveyed the whole room, and noticed that it was a far cry from my room back home, but amazingly, I liked it.

The California king sized bed is so soft and comfy, it was literally inviting with its midnight blue comforter and black pillows. The wall in the headboard part is all black, but there are lights installed in it, that illuminate the whole room, the right side wall was all glass, overlooking a vast forest that I can see with the help of my insanely eyesight. It is also a doorway to a balcony. There is a lazyboy in the foot of the glass wall. The left wall was a combination of white and brown, adored with a deer's horn, that became a bullcap, and coat holder. There is also some abstract painting of a –I would guess- crying wolf.

In the far right side of the room is a door that I would guess will lead you to the bathroom, beside it is a sliding door to I also guess a closet.

Just when I traveled my gaze to the big door, I heard a heavy footstep approaching to the door, I don't want whoever that is to know that I am awake so I dive again in the comforter and hide my head. I closed my eyes, and calmed my nerves, just as the door slowly opened. The footstep approached the right side of the bed and stop, Nathan.

For a creepy and unknown reason I knew it was him. I feel the bed dip when he sit down.

"Tamara, I know your awake." I open my eyes, still not removing the comforter that covering my head. It is the first time he says my name, and it warms my heart, I liked him calling me endearments, but I still liked it when he says my name. And I remembered why I am here, what he says, and the fact that I still knew him for about a few hours and his here sitting in the bed that I am sleeping in. it sounded wrong. So wrong. But then again, why is it that every time I am with him, I never doubt him, never question and feared him, there is something in him, which reassured me and calms me. That is what I want to know, because right now, what I understand based on my research, is that a mate is your other half, your partner in life, but it never explains what you feel, it never explains about a freaking mate-link!

I heard Nathan sigh and reach the hand that is gripping the comforter above my head. Just as he hold my hand I abruptly removed the comforter and glare at him.

"Explain." I said and sit up. He run his hand in his face and looked at me wearily, and it somehow tug my hand, and I tighten my hand so that I won't stupidly reach him and hug him.

What is wrong with me?!

He suddenly smile and shake his head

"There is nothing wrong with you, baby." He said huskily, and his looked suddenly became clouded, and it affects me in many ways that one. The clenching in my stomach is disturbing, so I open my mouth to say something but ending in clearing my throat when I saw that his gaze transfer from my eyes to my lips.

"You're so beautiful." He said with so much emotion that the complement planted straight to my heart. I smiled and about to reply from it when I suddenly remember that his comment was an answer to my unvoiced-private self question.

"Stop reading my thoughts! You're creeping me out!" I hissed at him, and he had the grace to chuckled at me.

"I can't help it baby, you're talking to our mind-link as clear as now" he said and motion his hand to us. I frown.

"Mind-link?" I voiced my question. No need in keeping it in.

"Yes, baby, all wolf can communicate through that, either they are in their wolf form or human form." He explained at me while his eyes dancing in merriment, like his enjoying this so much.

"But in our case, it is much stronger because we are mates, it's like having a direct line to each other." He explains further.

"How?" I asked confused. "I am not a wolf, I mean, I don't have a wolf." I said. He looked at me and frowns.

"You're wolf is detached?" he asked me. I shrug

"Maybe, I never shifted. I don't have one." I said to him, suddenly my disappointment envelop me.

"But, Tamara, you have one." He told me while frowning.

"What? How can you tell?" I asked him

"My wolf can sense the wolf in you. True, she is not responding at the moment, but she is inviting us in, letting us into your subconscious and conscious mind. Sending us images, and your thought.

"Us?" I whispered.

"Me and my wolf." He answer me.

"You are two... person?" I asked tentatively. He laugh, not a soft small laugh bit a full blown laugh. Then he shook his head when he recovered from his laughing spree.

"No." he said with conviction.

"I am one man, though, we communicate by senses, our beast has an extraordinary senses, it help us became stronger, have sharper eyesight, strong smelling capabilities, and whatnot. And it also send us trivial information like your mate" He explained to me slowly, some of it I already know so I just nod.

"You said, you can sense my wolf? Are you sure?" I asked him.

"Yes, baby, so sure." He answer me, I frown.

"But I can't feel her." I told him. He frown at me.

"There are some extinct cases when a wolf goes to hibernation, in your case, maybe because you're still young when your parents died, it affect the development of your wolf. So it goes hiding to the safer place of your subconscious."

I looked at him and process his explanation. Was it possible?

I nod.

"Can you Explain more about mates?" I asked him. Though my head was already swirling with the information, I need to know this.

"Mates are your soul mates, the one destined to you, the one that the Goddess, made only for you." He said, while looking at me intently, I felt heated blood in my cheeks, because he said it the way like he is complementing me.

"And?" I whispered, and gulp the imaginary lumped in my throat.

"How'd you know I was your mate?" I asked him. He smiled.

"It's because when I saw you, everything seems to fade in the background, it's the way you took my breath away, the way you knock my guts and re arrange my life, the way you make me realized that life is worth fighting and living because I have you." My heart constricted. My hammering heart was hurting my chest. The pounding of the veins in my head intensify. This is the emotion I am afraid to recognize. I open my lip to say something but Nathan's hand touch my cheeks, and suddenly, the butterflies in my stomach awaken, adding to my chaotic feelings.

"Your crying." He whispered and brushes my tears away. I am not aware that I am crying, the intense emotion numbs my whole body. He tugs me and suddenly I am envelop with the warmest hug in my entire life. When was the last time someone hug me? When someone comfort me this way? It was ages ago. In fact it was when my parents died.

I suddenly felt all the tiredness, the weariness, the shock, the intense emotions, the doubt, in came to toll in me. I can't take it anymore, so I relieved it by clutching Nathan's shoulder, he hoist me and deposit mew in his lap, but I am too busy burying my face in his neck to noticed our position, my silent tears, became a full blown cry. I cry and cry until I can't take it no more and succumb to sleep once again, only remembering the reassuring voice of Nathan telling me it's gonna be alright.

a/n: gotta go! mhuaw!