Loosing Interest

Why did you even Came

I was just out a terrible relationship and was struggling to sleep I don't know when I became a night owl and started struggling to sleep at night it was cured when I was with bf as sleeping next to him made me sleep .

But he was gone and find someone new he can sleep with and I was back with my sleepless night .

It was our break after our exams we have nothing to do well to be specific I have nothing to do in the whole hostel as my roommates have their bf they can spend time with whereas me just watch them being lovy dovy all day that made me so badly wanted to be with someone again .

I was bored alone depressed and had lack of sleep .

It was then when I guess my peaceful life took a turn .

My roomate and her bf started watching a new series and I started watching it to and a friend of them asked me If he can join me to as he liked the series very much and wanted to see it again .

I don't know why I always have problem with saying no to people
So I just let him watch the series with me .

First few days nothing happen we were I guess 5 inches apart as days goes by that 5 inch distance became 1 inch and suddenly there was no space btw us .

I don't know how while bickering and hitting each other playfully we somehow started holding hands .

And it became our habit somehow to hold hands while watching the series.

I know pretty questionable why we were holding hands when we were seriously nothing I didn't have any sort of feelings for him and I was pretty much sure about he didn't have them too .

But without thinking too much about it when ever he shaked his hand a signal to give my hand so he can hold it I gave in and let him hold my hands .

One day he was playing with my hand and out of the blue he kissed it and I took my hand back instantly I couldn't say it but it was too much so I showed it by taking my hand back .

But I don't know when I got used to him kissing my hand too and I always let him.

Then slowly I started leaning on his shoulder while watching and suddenly when realisation struck I straight up my head and asked what Was I doing but slowly he started offering his shoulder and it was more comfortable watching the series that way .

As days goes by he started keeping his hand around my shoulder and I lay my head on his chest .

Yes that's how we were watching the series we may sound like a couple but no we weren't neither of us had feelings .

I was just liking his company and the affection and comfort which was Suddenly missing from my life so I never just let him do small little things of affection as I liked it after a long time .

As the series was coming to the end we didn't know when the pause button was press and we start talking about each other he used to tell me about himself and I used to tell him about me .

He used to stay at my room till five in the morning sometimes six too.

And since we were wispering whole night my other roomate which was also my senior was getting irritated by our whispering sound due to which she and I got into an agreement one day .

I was mad because my other roommates which was also my first friend here didn't really took my side .

So I just went into the laundry area and stayed there .

He messaged me and comforted me all night even and told me even if everyone is against you I will take your stand bo matter what I will fight with my own friends even If I have too .

Now remembering those things made me wonder was all of that was just an act to impress me .

Because that time which is by the way just one month before he was always there with me him coming to my room all the time .

Not going out with his friends so he can spend time with me .

Filling the bottle of our room helping me cleaning the dishes even making tea for me all the sort of thing he would never do he would do it for me even he get teased by his friends still he did it .

A sad smile is replaced by the happy one the one I used to get on my face when I see his messages of asking me where I am and when I will reach the hostel .

He even broke up with his somekind of casual relationship he was in even though I opposed the idea as I didn't wanna burden myself with saying yes to him if he was thinking of approaching me .

Well I started laying on his lap and he used to put mesleep by caressing my hair and sometimes he fell asleep too but always go to his room after tucking me in the blanket and hutting me playfully on the head his sign of saying goodnight .

One day he insisted on watching the series side by side and I resiseted but not that strongly and we were cuddling each other after few hours my head was in his shoulder and as he gently place his ams around me and I wraped my arms around him .

My friend and his boyfriend knew something was going on so they asked I really didn't have any feelings for him but I got to know he have and I felt ashamed because I wanted him but could not reciprocate what he feels for me .

He assured me it was okay it was up to me what I want I can do he will not force me for anything I can even forget that he confessed his feelings for me .

"If you think you are using me then so it be I am okay with it you are doing nothing wrong " his words which he used to play with my heart .

That time felt so good that they made that feelings grow which weren't there from the start
his words care affection the comfort and cuddle we used to have at night .

Him treating me with respect something I didn't get in my previous relationship and him always giving me words of love and affection did impossible in two weeks that impossible thing which my ex could't do in six months .

He made fell for him in two weeks and I wonder where he learned it from because I was determined wnd never interested in him he was neither my type nor I liked him even looked at him that way but still he made me feel for him .

I started feeling for him and when I expressed it ...........

Continue in the next part .