Annihilation

Comfortable

Worry was the only emotion I knew over the two extra days that passed without the other's return. I stayed on guard at nearly every second, unable to focus on anything outside of listening for footsteps, the rustling of trees that would signal their presence.

When it finally came I was away, off assessing soil around the bushels of berries with Jin. He was surprised that they were still sprouting new bundles, digging his fingers into the dirt in gratitude for Mother Earth.

"We'll check back one more time if we get another good rain to see if there's more sprouts. The plants are still holding a good amount of moisture somehow so I'm hoping we can get one more bunch before it dies out." He rambled on our walk back to camp, speaking through mouthfuls of berries that he constantly plucked from the satchel at his side.

A wave of relief washed over my every cell at the tune of Jimin's laughter, sounding through the short distance we had to camp before we could spot them past the roughage.

Jin waved me on while I picked up speed, multiple heads turning at the noise of the footsteps I didn't bother quieting.

I reached for each of them. First Namjoon, a hand trailed down his arm as he gave me a half smile of assurance that he was unharmed and revealing a single indent in his cheek. My fingertips barely left him before I was grabbing onto Jimin. He spun around, shoulder length locks flipping with the lightweight twirl of his small frame.

Yoongi knew I'd be coming for him next and stepped back with a small nod. We were barely close enough for me to hear the short affirmation that he was okay, clearing my view of Shelby.

She was already muttering the words over and over for Taehyung, who squatted next to where her knees were pressed into the ground.

"I'm fine." She uttered, the amount of time she paused before speaking them again varying. Tears streaked her dirt-coated cheeks, falling continuously as if she were unaware of them.

I ignored the rolling of Yoongi's eyes in my peripheral vision, taking a spot next to Taehyung. He withdrew his fingertips from where they'd been reaching for Shelby's, hesitant to touch without her initiation and leaving her to me.

"Can you give us a few minutes alone?" I made a request to the entire group. There was a pressure even I could feel, for her to actually be fine rather than stating it.

They dispersed without a word, the trailer door closing with a slam and ground crunching with footsteps.

I let another minute of silence pass until Shelby registered that we were alone, her chanting slowing so that it was a near whisper before fading entirely. Her eyes were wide, chestnut irises coated in an emotion I couldn't read.

She blinked, another set of tears trailing over the high apples of her cheeks but she finally looked as if she was seeing me.

We didn't speak. I knew that she would if she had the words, but I didn't expect her to yet. It didn't take much to put together that she was overwhelmed by the world, by slashing through the skulls of people who despite currently being monsters, once had lives and families that were lost to the world.

The quiet we sat in lasted as long as she needed, until she uttered a single word.

"Carolus."

She hadn't mentioned the community since we left and now she spoke it with distaste on her tongue, haunted eyes curving into those that had accepted reality. "After being out there." She leased a shuttered breath. "You must have thought we were insane. Stupid dresses. Dumb fucking balls. We were insane." She admitted, head moving back and forth with each confession.