Lessons

16. c.r.e.a.m (caine rules everything around me)

I sat, hands folded, as I held Caine's note in my lap. The rest of the day seemed to progress in slow motion. I wasn't sure when to open it, or if I even should. To me, it seemed like Pandora's box. Curiosity did kill the cat, but would my satisfaction bring me back?It'd been a few hours after the fact, and I hadn't told Pete yet. I wasn't sure if I should. I know he wouldn't judge me, but even still. This seemed like something I should keep under lock and key, at least for now. As I sat in my history class, I thought about how differently time had progressed in the last few days. It was barely the middle of the week and my life had undergone so many changes. I'd even dumped one situationship for another. It was the very beginning of a fling at best. But still, the freshness of it all was starting to overwhelm me.The bell rang, ending my train of thought. Going through the motions, I packed away my things and headed to lunch. Pete and I were going out today; some new restaurant he'd found or something like that. We could open the note together then. Hopefully, I'd know what to say by then. As I made my way to the parking lot, I couldn't help from shuddering over the waves of eyes on me. I wasn't sure what for, or if it was just my paranoia, but the feeling still lingered, and I didn't like it. Pete stood by the bus stop, waving me over.

"Don't worry, we're not taking the bus. I called an Uber."

I nodded, slipping the note into my pocket.

"So," I begin, "You'll never guess what happened during my English class today."

"You fucked him, didn't you?" Pete asked, passively scrolling through his phone.
I turned my head so quickly that I'm sure I gave myself whiplash."What?! How'd you guess?"

He quickly put his phone at his side."I was kidding, Aria! Didn't expect you to be so forward," He nudged me gently.

"No, no! We didn't go that far. We just...I don't know."Quick visions cascaded through me as I omitted myself. My brain was punishing itself for denying the memory, lest we forget the sheer amount of feelings involved.

"Oh, I'm sure you know," He said. "The question is, are you going to tell me?"

I bit my lip As Pete's brow raised. I'd have to tell him eventually. What was I so afraid of?"We kinds..sorta...messed around in his classroom," I murmured under my breath.

"I knew it! I told you that it'd happen. Tell me everything."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ As I ran my fingers along my cup of water, Pete sat across from me, grinning ear to ear. I swear, he lives vicariously through me sometimes."So," he began, "was it good?"

My face dropped onto the table, "Oh my god, there are no words. Pure perfection."

It was true, I could still feel his hands along my body as if I'd never left him. That insatiable feeling was slowly starting to return. But how? It had barely been three hours and I was missing him already. How could I need another fix so soon?

"I totally knew that this would happen eventually," Pete went on, "but so soon? Never would've guessed."

"Honestly?" I interjected, "I really don't know how to feel about it. In the moment it was beyond words. But afterward, I just felt so..."empty" is the best way to describe it. But not empty in the way that I felt used up. But, soulless and empty. Like in the act of leaving that classroom, I left a part of myself with him."

Pete started at me blankly. He probably thought I was crazy, and he'd be right to think so. It's damn near impossible to feel this strongly about someone so quickly. I'd have to be delusional or something. But he only followed up briefly.

"How so?"

As the waiter brought us our food, I continued, "It's not his fault. I know I couldn't stay afterward anyway with the period ending and all. And I'm probably overreacting anyway. But it felt like he was pushing me out like he was ashamed or something."

"I'm sure he wasn't ashamed. As opposed to..."

"As opposed to what?"

"Maybe he was nervous?

Perhaps Pete had a point."That makes sense normally. He just seems way too confident,"

"Those are often the people who are the most nervous. You know that. I mean look at me."

As Pete munched on his fries, I figured that we was right. But I still wasn't sure. I could'nt believe that I was seventeen and still asking my friend of a guy really liked me. I'm too old for this shit. I realized that if I wanted to know something, I'd have to find out for myself.""Those must be some good fries, huh?" I ask, stealing one from his plate.

"You have no idea."