The Road

Alibi

It was extremely difficult not being suspicious in front of my colleagues, thankfully Vinny left "clues" by accident, the knife and fake ID card. Also, pieces of rope. I just had to make an excuse, that I didn't make it in time and they left at the scene of the crime. After that, I came home from work, and sat on the couch with a beer. God, that threesome was heavenly. Always had a crush on Vincent Miller back in high school. He was the troublemaker, the clown and he knew how to perform. Can't believe that I had a threesome with Vincent Miller and his boyfriend. Didn't think this day would come, I've always wanted to be with that criminal, but what stopped me was Larry Carson. Then, I suddenly liked him too. This town was extremely conservative and religious. The thought of having sex before marriage was a horror, especially if you were gay. My first male crush, was...uh...he was my friend, Adam.

Oh, Adam, I loved him. So, so much. We could not be together, ever. My sweet Adam.

24 years ago...

"Kirk, do you think we should go by the lake sometime? That would be nice." Adam said cheerfully.

"Yeah, just the two of us?" I asked, hoping he'd say yes.

"Yes, maybe a bible and we can read together."

"That sounds amazing." I said.

"Great!" Adam runs off to his house down the block.

A thought came to my mind, 'You can confess to him! You can finally do what you always wanted to do!', but that was stupid. I can't be with him, he can't be with me. It was basically a sin. A sinful act against God. Even though, that same God gave us the free will and the ability to love. And I, wanted to love Adam. Make him mine and I'm his. I want his touch, the intimacy. I want him to feel me, like me, love me. Be with me. To take me.

It was noon, we came to the lake and sat together under the tree. Read the Bible and its verses. We sat side by side, but I really wanted to sit on his lap. I wanted to touch his hand when flipping pages. Then, we stand up and take a break from reading.

"So...have you ever had a crush on someone? That you really like?" I asked nervously.

"Oh, yeah, I really like Lily Ann." He said with amusement, "She is very pretty and smart."

Oh...fuck! Of course a girl. She doesn't notice you, she thinks of you as a friend, she is not interested in you or your life. I FUCKING AM! Calm down, calm down, Kirk.

"What about you?" He questioned.

You.
You.
YOU.
YOU...
YOU!

"You." I blurt out. My heart sank. I felt ashamed.

"...what?" He was confused.

"I really like you, Adam!" I shout, "I love you, I want you, I need you, and I want to be yours!"

He stared at me with terror, he was petrified and...upset. He was concerned.

"Kirk, what in great name do you mean?" He was disgusted, "You can't be. You shouldn't be. And you shall be!", he started getting angry.

I was horrified, I wanted to die. I want God to save me from this cruel torture, send his angels and take me away to heaven.

"Please understand! I'm sorry..."I cried out.

Tears were forming, but not fallen yet.

"I want to feel something! You are my only savior! Please!" I was begging him not to tell and to just listen.

His eyes turned soft, kind and sweet. "Oh, poor thing..." he said with sympathy.

He gently holds my face and kisses me, melting into my lips. Yes...Yes! I kiss back, I hug him. He suddenly puts his tongue in mouth and gnawing at my lips. My lips become swollen and red. I don't care, I moan softly. He brings me down to the ground, his back against a tree and I sit on his lap. Unconsciously grinding him and he does same. He's rough with me, and I love it.

"Can we?" I asked.

"Absolutely not. I can't have penetration sex, obviously with you or any kind of man." He says sternly while grinding me.

"You can still jerk me off or I can give you a blowjob"

"Mmh...that seems fine." He comes to an agreement.

Both of us stand up, I push him into the tree. He shoves me onto my knees, unzipped his pants and I pull the fabric down. He grips my hair, putting his penis in my mouth. Moving my head frantically and his head is leaning on the rough wood. I was gagging and I wasn't used to such an act like this. He moans and groans heavily, he couldn't stop. I didn't want this to stop. I grabbed his thighs to keep me steady.

"Oh, oh...ah." he moaned and he kept my head down. I feel a warm substance in my throat. His hand lets go, he pants and I'm gasping for air.

Present day...

It wasn't fucking fair. He did really love me. Nobody understood that, the love I felt for him was just an example of sin and fear. These memories make me cry and wonder how things could've gone differently. I get up from the couch and go into the kitchen to get my keys, leaving the house and going for a long drive. I don't care where I'm going. I'm just going. Mindlessly driving around town.

There was red light ahead, as I'm waiting for it to turn green, a familiar car is next to me. It was black with a few scratches and dents. The license plate is rusted.

"Hey, sweets!" I turn my head to see Vinny in the passenger side.

The two criminals drive off before the light signal could change. I come after them and I didn't want to loose them again.