Wildflower

12

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When Amelia was nineteen years old, she boarded the Athena I, one of the very first ships that was to land on Pandora. Although the project was top-secret, her biology professor, René Harper, had pulled her aside to tell her about it. He said he'd recommend her for the opportunity, as her bright young mind, willful spirit, and talent with a pen would be paramount on base. Dazzled by both the opportunity and her professor's faith in her, Amelia had accepted, immediately breaking up with her low-commitment boyfriend Ethan and informing her parents that she would be leaving. After undergoing training and medical checks for several months leading up to departure, the Athena I finally set for Pandora, and Amelia, like almost all other passengers, was put through cryotherapy-- a body preservation technique that allowed subjects to stay stationary indefinitely, both physically and mentally.

When Amelia arrived on Pandora, she experienced "landing sickness"-- not an uncommon phenomenon for those emerging from cryotherapy. Except for one thing: her illness was twice as intense as anyone else's, lasting much longer and involving unprecedented symptoms like constant vomiting and excessive bloating. After running a series of tests, there was no denying the inexplicable truth: Amelia was pregnant.

The first nine months of Amelia's interplanetary expedition were spent confined to base, making a plethora of paintings and filling up all available wall space with stunning renditions of both Earth and Pandora flora and fauna, the latter of which she'd only seen in pictures brought home from the field. Many of the researchers regarded her as a little bit crazy during this time period, stuck in a concrete building for months wasting her youth while there was a whole world to explore just outside its bounds. Finally, after Liza was born, Amelia was allowed back on the field.

Baby Liza was everyone's favorite. The engineers developed a baby exopack for her, so Amelia could take her along while she worked with René and his new business partner, Grace. On hard days where Amelia and her coworkers would have to go somewhere dangerous, like hike a cliff or take algae samples from the base of the Muku Waterfall, the Hell's Gate staff would rotate babysitting her. To everyone else, Amelia's life seemed wonderful, but Amelia couldn't escape the feeling that she'd wasted her youth.

As René and Grace lobbied for a school, Amelia contemplated her life. One day, she went for a walk as her Avatar to clear her head and met and fell in love with a Na'vi man, one who showed her the whole of Pandora through the eyes as someone who worshipped it, not exploited it. From then on, it felt to Amelia as if her eyes had opened: This was what she was meant for. She was too young to work, to make decisions that would harm other people, to be part of a company that dictated everything she did. She was too young to be committed to the RDA, and was built for other things. All these thoughts took her over, consuming her mind as she worked, cared for her daughter, and pretended that being a Dreamwalker wasn't slowly killing her.

When Liza was seven, about a year after the school had been approved and only a few months after it had been built, Amelia, Grace, and René attended an emergency, celebratory meeting regarding the brand-new discovery of unobtainium, and how the RDA planned to begin mining and profiting off of it. This was the last straw for her, and as soon as the meeting adjourned, she had an explosive fight with Grace and René. She said she couldn't be part of an association with no compassion, who planned to destroy yet another innocent, beautiful planet who had showed it nothing but beauty and hospitality. Grace and René called her a coward, and said that she wouldn't do anyone any good by running away. They said she was better off trying to make a change from the inside, and that she'd known she had a duty to fulfill from the minute she boarded the ship. She had expertise that the team needed, and would be much more effective from the inside than the outside if she wanted to fight the RDA. Amelia maintained that she couldn't take it, then stomped off toward her bedroom. Grace and René figured that she just needed to cool down, but the next morning-- Liza's eighth birthday-- Amelia was gone, leaving only a note:

Dear Grace and René-

I write to you to tell you that I meant it about leaving. I've said what I need to say, and I'm sorry that this affects you so, but you know that I cannot live like this. I've met someone, and I want to choose him. I want to choose this life. I am still young, and I hope you understand that. To Liza, tell her I'm sorry. I do not mean to abandon her, but I want her to have options-- although, unlike me, she does not deserve to be called a coward for whichever one she makes. She was born into this position, and I firmly believe that it's up to her whether she stays at the RDA or lives with the Na'vi. Whatever and whenever she decides, I love her, and will forever be sorry for leaving her.

-Amelia

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