Roses

Chapter 24

Zoey

The smell of coffee wakes me up from my slumber. I rub my eyes, before opening them and find Adam sitting beside me on the bed, my laptop propped on his lap.

"Good morning, sleepyhead." He turns his head and smiles down at me. "Or shall I say noon?"

"Hey," my voice is rough with sleep as I sit up. "What are you doing?" I point my head towards my laptop.

"I was waiting for you to wake up and just found this sitting on your nightstand. It's so good, baby." It takes me a moment to realize he's talking about my book.

I don't know how to react. I want to address the fact that he read it without asking my permission, but a part of me just wants to focus on his compliment. I've never showed my work to anyone other than the agents who always rejected it.

So this is the first time someone said something good about my writing skills.

"What's wrong?" He asks, concern lacing his voice. He puts the laptop back where I'd left it this morning and cups my cheeks.

"I...," I clear my throat and look away. "Thanks."

"You really are very talented, love." His thumbs gently stroking my cheeks makes me meet his eyes.

"Too bad none of the people in the publishing industry think that," I mutter. Then as if to add to my own misery, I laugh in a self-deprecating manner.

He stares at me for a beat, something moving behind his eyes. And then he shakes his head as if it doesn't matter and says, "I bet this book's going to turn everything around."

I smile at him, before my eyes find something else on my nightstand. "You went out?"

He follows my gaze and grabs the water bottle and small box, leaving the tray with two coffees in it for now.

"No. I had Sam drop these." He hands me the box while he opens the bottle. When I finally have it in my hands I realize what it is. Plan B pill.

The conversation we had had before I fell asleep plays back in my mind. You know I'll take care of both of you, right?

As I get the pill out of its packaging and pop it in my mouth, I convince myself his earlier words must have only been his attempt at dry humor. Because how could he possibly want to have kids with me, right?

I chug down more than half the water and hand the rest back to him. He smiles at me as he twists the cap back on and puts it away, only to grab the tray next.

I can't help thinking that he knows no one has ever looked after me like this and he also knows how much I like it.

"What are you thinking right now?" He asks as I settle against the headboard and take a sip of my coffee.

"Just that.... this is different." I contemplated lying to him for a moment, but then decided against it. How can I expect him to be honest with me when I don't extend the same courtesy to him? "I don't think I ever had moments like these with any of my exes."

He clenches his jaw at my last word. "And you like these moments?" He asks after a brief pause.

"Yes."

"Good," he says staring straight into my soul. "They are exes for a reason. And I don't ever plan on joining them." He leans in to press a soft kiss on my cheek. I can't help releasing a small exhale of pleasure at the sweet gesture.

But it also brings my mind back to his confession of love and everything else he said and did this morning.

"What happened to... that man?" I whisper my question, as if speaking about it softly will change this morning's events.

"You already know what I did to him," he speaks every word slowly, watching me closely for my reaction. "So I'm assuming you mean what happened to the body?"

The body. It takes me everything not to shudder at that word. So I simply nod.

"Sam took care of it."

"You're not worried about an investigation?" Though I ask, a part of me already knows he has thought of every scenario.

"In the one year he spent outside prison, he didn't make any friends who would report him missing. But if somehow it came to that, Bruno will handle it. He feels partly responsible for everything, considering he hired the man."

"Viktor Bruno knows you killed his man?"

"I gave him a call while you were asleep, yes." Adam taps his forefinger twice against the paper cup he's holding, before taking a large gulp of his coffee.

I wonder if he slept at all. He seems to be on top of everything. Not that I expected any less. Deep down I guess I always knew whatever he did, he did with a level of planning and precision that would leave army generals in awe. Why would he be any different when he committed a murder?

"And he wasn't mad?" From what I observed at the party, Adam and Viktor didn't exactly strike me as the best of friends.

"Not after learning my reason for doing it." Something warms his eyes then to a degree I have never seen before. It's a blend of protectiveness and love I had given up on ever seeing in a man's eyes for myself.

I killed him for wanting to kill you.

I'll kill all his friends.

My heart erupts in a beat so frantic I'm afraid it might claw its way out of my chest and fall right into his palm.

"I didn't think his intentions were that evil. Back at the party," I mutter and look away. I hope he understands this is as close to an apology he will get from me, for lying about my conversation with the man.

"You thought wrong, Zoey." The undercurrent of anger in his voice is unmistakable. But there's something else too. He turns my head towards him with the light pressure of his forefinger on my cheek. "From now on, you will come to me." For everything. He doesn't have to say it. His imploring eyes communicate it just fine.

But why would he possibly want to be my shelter from every storm?

He loves you. My mind is quick to reply. But it's my mind answering, not my heart. And until I feel his love in my heart, I will never truly understand what he feels for me.

"Promise me," he says when I stay silent.

"Promise you what?"

"You won't keep anything from me."

"What do you want me to tell you?" My question breaks into a laugh.

"Everything." He strokes my cheek with the tip of his finger. No hint of amusement in his voice or face. This is all very serious to him. "Everything that happens in your day that I don't witness. Every thought you have." He taps my temple.

"Every question?" I raise an eyebrow.

He has been very forthcoming this morning. But that doesn't mean there aren't any remaining unanswered questions between us.

"Yes, those too," he agrees. "Everything that you are, I want it all."

"Then tell me something." I take a deep breath and ask him the most important question on my mind right now. "What are we?"

He leans in till his face is mere inches away from mine. "Together." He presses a chaste kiss on my lips, pulling back to look at me again. "You're mine. And I'm yours. Is that clear enough?"

"Yes."

And with one word, a realization settles slowly on me: what I just started with Adam will be nothing like my previous relationships. If this falls apart, I will lose a part of myself I'll never get back again.