I Never Want The Sun To Set

1. Sunrise

14 February, 2018

Joel sat quietly in his room, the dim light of the late afternoon sun filtering through the window. His pen hovered over the open pages of his diary, the weight of it felt like a small anchor in his hand. With a deep, almost imperceptible sigh, he began to write, his mind already lost in the thoughts that swirled within him.

"I sought sunshine"

To me, from within,

Never once did I ache for another's presence,
Revealing the depths of transformation within.
My heart never quickened its pace,
Yet, countless questions begged for utterance.
Her beams, aglow with joy and promise,
A sun eternal, painting my world in hues divine.
Now, in this fleeting instant,
Epiphany dawns, radiant and profound,
I've succumbed to the allure of the sun,
The harbinger of hope, the smile that never wanes.
I shall venture forth and beseech her embrace,
For in her light, I find solace and grace.

The words came out in a flow, the ink tracing emotions too deep for casual expression. Joel re-read the lines, each word somehow feeling truer than the last. He could almost see the sun in his mind's eye—the same one he'd watched so many times at the edge of the horizon, painting the world in golden hues. And now, it wasn't just a symbol of the world's beauty—it was a beacon of something much more personal. A comfort. A need. A longing.

Placing the pen down carefully, he let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. As he sat there, watching the ink dry slowly, the sound of footsteps in the hallway grew closer. It was his mom.

Mom: "Joel, what's up?"

Her voice, soft and warm, drifted in from outside his room. Joel snapped out of his thoughts, blinking once or twice as he stood up from his desk.

Joel: "Oh, just soaking in the sunset from the window, Mom."

He turned toward the window, his eyes briefly flicking toward the fading orange of the horizon before returning to the room. His mother's voice held a certain calmness—always reassuring, but at this moment, it didn't reach him completely. Something about the fading light made him feel like he didn't want to be bothered.

Mom: "Ah, taking in the beauty of nature, huh?"

She smiled, the corners of her lips lifting in that warm way only she could. It was a smile that comforted him when everything else seemed uncertain.

Joel: "Yeah, exactly. It's just so peaceful."
He shifted, eyes still focused on the distant skyline, but his mind was elsewhere, tangled in a quiet storm. He wanted to savor the moment of peace—the one thing that made sense.

Mom: "Well, don't stay there too long. Dinner's almost ready."

Joel: "Got it, Mom. Thanks."

As she walked away, Joel stood there for a few more moments, his gaze still locked on the waning light. A deep, almost melancholic yearning stirred in him. He whispered to himself, almost as if afraid of hearing his own voice.

Joel: "I never want the sun to set."

A few months ago.

The early morning light had already begun to spill over the town, brightening the world with a promise of summer. 

The calendar read 15 June, 2017. It was the first day back at school after a long, seemingly endless break, and as much as Joel tried to convince his parents to let him stay home, he was unsuccessful. So, he walked to school that morning with the same reluctance he carried every year.