Against The Tide

Chapter Twelve: New Struggles

When morning came, Mikasa woke up to the sound of Carla's cries from the nursery. She opened her eyes slowly, her body feeling exhausted from the night before. She forced herself to sit up, feeling a small breeze from the opened window, allowing the scent of lavender to fill the room. It helped Mikasa relax slightly, as she stood up, clutching her wrapped hand. It was beginning to sting again, which frustrated her as she winced, waving her hand in an attempt to get it to stop hurting, and made her way to the nursery, on tunnel vision to take care of her daughter. Her hair was a bit messy and sticking up, though it didn't get near the level as bad back when her hair was short. When she entered the nursery, she could see Carla had managed to kick her blanket over, crying a bit loudly, kicking her little feet, and moving her arms. Mikasa hurried over to the crib gently picked up her daughter and soothed her, whispering and rubbing her back. She slowly took a seat in the rocking chair by the window. Carla whimpered, fussing a bit and gripping Mikasa's front with her tiny hands.

"It's okay butterfly, mama's here, are you hungry? That's it...there you go sweetheart" Mikasa helped her little one latch onto her breast as she nursed her, knowing that within the next few months, Carla would be able to gradually start eating more solid foods.

On one hand, this was a good thing as with how Mikasa's mental state was, she needed nutrients for herself. But on the other hand, Mikasa would miss this bonding time with her daughter. She wasn't sure if she should mention this to Armin with how everything had been, but it made Mikasa develop baby fever already. Carla was theirs, she was their daughter. Nothing would change that. But still, Mikasa couldn't help but daydream about having a child of Armin's, picturing an adorable blonde-haired, blue-eyed son or daughter. The idea of a mini Armin running around with their daughter, made Mikasa smile.

But as much as it was something she knew she would want eventually again, she knew now wasn't the time. With how bad her mental health had gotten, going through another pregnancy with all those hormones and emotions would be far too much on her. And Mikasa knew this. For now, she enjoyed the peaceful morning as she gently rocked her daughter.

"Mama's sorry if she scared you last night, sweetheart. You're okay little one..." She soothed gently, holding her daughter close. Carla's cries quieted instantly once she was being fed, her blue eyes looking around curiously. Mikasa had been so tunnel-visioned to tend to her baby, that she didn't notice if Armin was still asleep in bed or not.

In the bedroom, Armin immediately began to stir when he felt Mikasa awake, hearing the cries of their little baby. He didn't react immediately though, as his body had been much more exhausted from the day prior than he had originally anticipated. So, he had snoozed in just for a few more moments, hearing the cries of his daughter quiet down softly, as well as Mikasa's soft voice soothing her.

Finally, as the sun began to rise a bit more, its rays danced in from the reflection of the window, causing golden rays to fall upon the silent room. Armin's face had been lit up against these golden streams, illuminating his carved features as he squeezed his eyes shut, feeling the sun blind his closed eyes. Finally, after a few moments, he stood up with a soft sleepy groan, rubbing the sleep from his eyes before he turned his glance towards the open door. He lazily brushed his bed head back into place, getting up from the bed before making it neatly.. always ensuring that Mikasa had some form of routine as she worked through her hard time, as well as a clean environment where she could escape to if Carla got to be too much for her. Once he neatly made the bed and fluffed the many pillows they had, Armin made his way to Carla's bedroom.

He leaned softly against the door, watching as the two bonded over Carla's breakfast. He smiled warmly, studying the way that Mikasa's face had matured ever since she had birthed their daughter.. and her beauty had only seemed to grow the more time he got to spend with her. Every day, he could never find the words to express his gratitude for what he was given.. and each day he made sure that Mikasa's beauty was something that was never taken lightly. With his negative self-image.. he knew that no matter what happened, he wanted his girls to know just how beautiful they were, inside and out. His mind wandered, and a massive smile remained plastered on his face as he watched the two in silence for a moment, moving to walk toward Mikasa. He leaned down, pecking her cheek softly, before his hand moved to brush Carla's hair back, allowing her tiny hand to grab onto his finger.