Star: Take 3

Chapter 13

SIMONE POV

The day of Angel's funeral arrived, and I felt as if I were moving through a dream. Ms. Carlotta helped me get ready. She brushed my hair into a low bun, her movements gentle yet precise. As I looked into the mirror, I was struck by my own reflection. My eyes were red and puffy, the skin beneath them darkened by sleepless nights. My usually vibrant brown eyes looked hollow.

Ms. Carlotta gave me a small smile, her kind eyes meeting mine. "Okay, I'm done," she said softly, her hands stopping their brushing motion. She gently rubbed my shoulders, her touch soothing. "The limo will be here any minute," she added, her voice firm.

"I'll be down in a sec. I'm gonna use the bathroom first." I said. Ms. Carlotta nodded. The situation began to sink in - today was the day we would say goodbye to Angel, the day his body would be laid to rest. As I entered the bathroom, I reached for the Xanax. Angel was gone, and the pain was overwhelming. I needed something to take the edge off.

As I slid into the limo, Star reached out to me. "Are you okay?" she asked, concern etched on her face. I nodded, forcing a smile. "Yeah, I'm fine," I said, my voice steady. But inside, I was a wreck. The Xanax had taken the edge off my grief, but the pain still burned like a hot coal in my chest. The ride to the church was a blur. I vaguely remembered Alex's hand on the seat beside me, her presence comforted me.

As I stood by Angel's casket, my mind swirled. The past week had been a whirlwind of shock and denial. I saw flashes of Angel's smile, heard his laugh echoing in my ears. And with each passing moment, the pain deepened, the void left by his absence growing stronger. The Preacher began to speak, his voice echoing through the church. I took my seat, my mind was all over the place.

As Ms. Carlotta began to sing "Precious Lord, Take My Hand," my eyes welled up with tears. The sad hymn echoed through the church, each note a reminder of the pain that consumed me. I stood at the podium, my hands clutching the sides. This was it - my eulogy for Angel, my husband. The words felt heavy in my mouth, each one a struggle to escape.

"Angel was...he was the best thing that ever happened to me," I began, my voice shaking. "He was my rock, my anchor in the storm. I still can't believe he's gone." I choked back a sob, my chest constricting. The room spun, the faces of the mourners a blur. But I pushed on, driven by a need to honor Angel's memory, to find some semblance of closure in this unbearable time.

"He had a laugh that could light up a room," I continued, my voice rising with emotion. "And a heart that was bigger than any person's right to deserve. I'll miss his arms around me, his warm touch, his kind words..."
My voice trailed off, the pain too great to bear. The room seemed to hold its breath, the mourners leaning in as if waiting for me to continue. But I couldn't. The words had failed me, the grief too raw and all-consuming.

As I stepped down from the podium, I collapsed into Ms. Carlotta's arms. She held me close. "It's okay," she murmured, her voice thick with unshed tears. "You did amazing, Simone. We're all so proud of you."

The rest of the service was a blur. Noah's voice echoed with raw emotion as he spoke, his words a testament to the bond he shared with Angel. Star's speech was filled with laughter and tears, a poignant reminder of Angel's infectious joy. And Alex - her words were a balm, a soothing presence in the midst of the pain.

As the funeral drew to a close, I felt a strange sense of peace settle over me. The pain was still there, a constant ache in my chest. But I knew then that I would get through this. I had to, for Angel. Noah, Derek, Alex, Star, and Cotton each took their turn at the podium. Their words painted a beautiful picture of Angel. They shared memories, laughter, and tears, each speaking from the heart.