Meet me on the roof

CHAPTER 5 - CAN WE?

AKRITI
AGE: 16

His hands lock me under him as he hovers above me pinning my hands above my head. His eyes bore into mine and I lean up to kiss his lips.

The kiss was soft until his tongue came into play. We go back and forth with both of our tongues shoved down our throats.

I have been feeling these out of world sensations for a month after knowing what sex is.

I watched porn twice. First time I did, I screamed. Second time, it felt natural and I liked it but both the time I saw it, Sahil caught me. It was embarassing but he never makes it feel like it is ominous. He believes it to be natural.

I want to know if he thinks about us that way, doing all those things that pornstars do. I think about him doing things to me too many times that my hand starts fondling my breasts on their own accord. The mere thought brings goosebumps down my spine. And I stifle a noise that is brewing at the back of my throat while kissing him.

This position makes me all hot and bothered. He looks so beautiful it makes my nipples go hard. Then he suddenly pulls back.

"Wait, wait" he says breathlessly, His house as silent as a funeral.

He backs down to sit on the edge of his bed. I sit straight too and slowly move closer to him. Then he grabs a pillow and puts it on his lap.

Ohh! He must have gotten an erection.

I blush thinking that I am the reason he feels so aroused. I sit beside him and look at him. He curses under his breath, "Stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?"

"A deer in the headlights look, it's a goddamn turn on." He chokes out.

I blush more and wrap my arms around his torso. He tries pushing me away but fails and hugs me right back. We stay in each other's embrace for a while.

I want to do sex with him, to experience what it feels like to have a man's heat. To orgasm and have pleasure. To see him coming for me and making us one. I want to be so close to him that not even air can escape.

"Bunny?" I call.

"Hmm?"

"I-I..." How do I ask him to put his cock in my pussy? It seemed so easy in porn.

Gross words. Yuck!

"What is it?" He asks calmly while I have a storm spinning inside.

"Can we mate?" I blurt out.

Maybe I should have used a better word than mate. Sex? In and out? Fuck? After I got to know the real meaning of 'Fuck'. I realised how sex is considered as a curse.

Sex is normal but admitting to someone that this is what you think about it, people start calling you names.

Sahil looks like a statue, he is abnormally still and his skin burning. His eyes fixated on me.

"Can we what?!" He asks astonishingly.

"Can we have- " I gulp and try to speak again, "se..sex?"

His eyes wide like they would come out of the socket so that I can play with them like marbles. After an unbearable and embarassing long paise. He shakes his head so hard that it could decapitate off his neck.

"But why?"

"You need a reason for why?!" He mocks.

"Yes. We are able bodied and can do right?"

"Able bodied?? Aki, we are sixteen!"

"Yeah so?"

He speaks in horror, "Sixteen year olds don't have sex in India. Have you lost your mind? What if you got pregnant?"

I didn't think about it. They didn't tell this in porn.

"I won't, you can use a condom right?"

"Obviously, but it's not entirely safe and we are only sixteen!"

"I don't see anything wrong." I tell him honestly.

He stares into my eyes and he can see the desire, love and want for him shining as bright as the sun.

I love him with everything that I have and I want this part of myself to be with him too.

He sighs and kisses me on the cheek. His cheek kisses are the most special. They are reserved for me. They tell me that I am valued, listened and loved.

"We will do when we get time and right now we don't have it." He says and kisses me on the cheek again.

I nod and lean onto his shoulder after kissing him on his forehead.

After a while, we start studying. We attend all the classes, do homework and have dinner. At night when I went to sleep with Sahil cuddling me from behind all I could think was getting closer to him in more than one way.

I am old but not old enough.
I am a child but not anymore.

What age am I in? It feels like I am stuck in a pendulum with no oscillation to decide sides.

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WORD COUNT- 830