Mixed emotions

Wednesday

Because of you, I start liking Wednesdays..

I never liked Wednesdays before to be honest.

Because it's the middle of school days.

Where we start to feel the laziness to continue going to school but also the excitement, because it's almost weekend, at the same time.

But because of you, I liked going to school. Specially on Wednesdays.

You became one of my inspirations.

Your smile became one of my motivations to go to school even though we have a lot of school works to do.

Your laugh made me want to wake up earlier than before I met you, just to hear it, and be the music to my ears.

And your dazzling eyes, that's so mesmerizing that I even battle with myself to not look at them, because I might fall harder and come to the point that I can't save myself anymore.

There are so many parts of you that makes me smile and want to be with you, that if I'll state all of them here, I might spend days just to say them all.

But one thing is for sure, you became a reason for me to like not only Wednesdays.

Wednesday is the day that we are tasked as the classroom cleaners.

I don't like cleaning to be honest.

But when I do it with you, I don't want to stop, and wish that the time goes slower.

I am willing to clean every corners of the black board. I am willung to carry the chairs around the room. I'm willing to clean the shelves, wipe the windows, the teacher's table, even the humidifier, just to spend time with you.

But just like the movies, it's either we end happy or with a tragic fate.

Ours is the latter.

I like spending time with you, admiring every piece of you, but you don't feel the same.

I may be willing to clean the whole classroom, but you don't even sweep and instead, escape from us and just go home. And just leave me-- i mean us, just like that.

I may write thousands of chapters about you, but you won't read them anyway.

But actually there's a chance that I'm wrong, that maybe you actually care and think or feel the same way about me.

That may be we don't end with a tragic fate.

Because that's the problem. I conclude things on my own. I'm too scared to walk towards you, or to just text "hi" to you.

I mean, I wanted to. But I am not a risk taker. I have my reasons,

But are they enough?

Are they enough for me to endure this uncomfortable feeling every time I see you with another girl?

Are my reasons enough for me to stay strong despite the rising jealousy in me when I hear rumors that you like someone else?

I don't know, I really don't.

But all I know is that I like you,

And my proof for that is my fondness with the day that I never thought I'd like.

If I don't like you, I don't think I'll ever love Wednesdays like this in the future.