Are you really okay?

Family

[TW!!!]
[Quick reminder ,this 'book' is about me only and nobody else ,I do NOT wish anybody to have the same situation ,It's about my life and Its not a story to be inspired of. However if you ever relate to any moments of this part, Im sorry. ♡]
— – — – — – — – — – — – — – —

Family. What does that word even mean for me? For other people, I'm sure , family is a group of people who you are strongly bonded with ,who you love ,they are your loved ones, they are supporting you ,taking care of you. They will always be there for you ,making you feel loved , cared about. But is it always?
My first years of life ,I could actually relate. I was the only child , all attention was on me ,my parents loved me. Even strangers loved me as a kid ,but nothing lasts forever. I've always been wanting a sibling ,I've been begging my parents to give me one , but one thing I wish I knew earlier was that, that everything is going to change.
A few months after i finally got the sibling I dreamed about ,it felt like my life had been turned upside-down. My mother, who was always caring about me the most, I was always on the first place , suddenly ,I became a ghost ,or no.. she became so careless , I felt like i was invisible to her. My father who always would call me his little princess, my father who would always joke around whenever I felt a little down. I would always be his little daughter, what happend to us?
Unfortunately, I started growing up, I can't deny the fact that I was sassy and bitchy , I was cold and mean ,but it all wasn't without a reason. I absolutely hated the way they gave their all love to my little sister ,that she was the only one they cared for ,that she was the only one they loved , that she was the only one who got all the attention , always. The only thing my parents cared about were my grades when I was in high school, they cared only about my successes or falls . They didn't care in what mental state I was when I started high school. It was sucking out my soul ,it was draining me, taking all the positive energy , joy , happiness and love out of me. My mother found many times some bloody tissues in my room, blades , pills etc. But never cared. She never spoke a word about it even though I wanted her to cry about it. I wanted her to care ,to worry ,to show true love towards me that I haven't felt for years. But I could only dream about it and hope , one day.. maybe one day? It could finally happen?
Silly girl, hopes down please.

— – — – — – — – — – — – — — – — – —

19.04.2024
470 words
8:30 PM