linger (itoshi sae)

2

You woke up, did your morning routine, got a reply from Rin telling you when you should come so that you could both meet before the match, you concluded it was a bit early to go out, then you sat down. Not using your phone, just looking in front of you, thinking... something was wrong.

You woke up way earlier than you anticipated, halfway into your routine you noticed you weren't doing it right, you were following his steps. So you did it all over again, your heart is beating quite fast, and you grew impatient for rin's reply literally just ten seconds after sending it. Yeah, something was definitely wrong.

Were you.. nervous?
"...ugh."

You lay down on your bed, shoving a pillow on your face, tears threatening to come out. Then you start over thinking.

What if we saw each other?
Will he even recognise me?
Did he find someone new?
Does he regret it all?
Were his apologies actually sincere?
Am I the bad person?
...

I can't do this anymore.

You sigh heavily, you were so sure these feelings stopped popping up, you were sure that guilt had died and got buried long ago, you were so sure you didn't miss him.
But it's understandable, you haven't seen him for a month now, only seeing him in magazines and articles. You didn't teach yourself how to react if you ever bumped into him in real life, but it's not your fault, he's a professional footballer, you won't see him in common places, you've known him to always being in fancy spots like any other celebrity with that preference, so you let your guard down.

You certainly weren't ready to see him in person, but you're going for rin, not him.

You decided it was time, so you got up and got ready, putting on your usual makeup (or go natural if its your choice).

You wore something simple, definitely not eye-catching, turning heads, confused or jealous ones. Rin's jersey, black spaghetti strap too under it, and some short jean shorts.

"here, wear my jersey I got a spare one, I think it'll look better if you don't know what to put on." You smile remembering the words he said to you.
Yeah, definitely not eye-catching.

As you arrived to the stadium, you saw a familiar figure already waiting for you, you ran up to him and hugged him from behind to startle him, and he surely flinched.
He turns to you and looks at you "hey," then takes a good look at your figure "you wore it." You smile at him "hi! Of course I did!" As you both let go of each other, you start walking into the halls "so are you ready?" He glances at you, "yeah, I guess." You keep a neutral expression, then you halt your movements, making him look back at you, he knows he's lying. "Rin, you know you also can't lie to me right?" You say, almost repeating the same words he said that other time. "I know you're stressed. You're going to play against your brother, you don't have to be ashamed of it or bottle it up, and besides, I'll be there watching and cheering for you."

His eyes almost widen at your words, then he takes steps forward and hugs you, "thank you." it took him moments to get off you "wanna.. see the others?" You tense up at that proposal, true it's been a while since you've talked to bachira, otoya, karasu, or shidou, now that you think about it, maybe you have been ignoring them this whole time, sure you've missed the others, but those four guys practically made you love your life.

"Do you think they'd want to see me..?" You ask genuinely, looking down. Then you start getting memories of you and your friendgroup, the trips you have done, the chaotic sleepovers, the hangouts, the night talks, all possibly spoiled and ruined by you and your broken heart.

You suddenly feel an arm on your shoulder, "let's go and find out, and if they don't then fuck them, all I know is that you didn't ruin anything, you only needed time to heal, everybody does that, especially after dating that insufferable dickhead." You giggle at his insults "So I hope you're not blaming yourself for it." You look up at him once again, eyes sparkling, looking directly at his, then you grin, "yeah, you're right."