The Eyes of Graphorns (Professor Sharp x mc)

Elaine's Secret

'You're thinking about her, aren't you?'

Sharp startled and raised his head. It suddenly occurred to him that he didn't know how long he had been sitting there brooding over what had happened in the past weeks. The ink on the quill he held in his hand had already dried, some of it had dripped onto the parchment on his desk. Sharp looked into the face of Dinah Hecat, who was sitting beside him and definitely hadn't been there before.

'Since when...?' Sharp began, puzzled, but Professor Hecat interrupted his stammering.

'I took the liberty of finding myself a seat. At my age, one can't wait around for reclusive potion masters to emerge from their musings. You haven't answered my question yet.'

She looked at him penetratingly.

'Hm?' he replied, still lost in thought. How in Merlin's name had she managed to enter his classroom without him noticing? Until now, he had always been able to rely on his senses, and it troubled him that he had been so inattentive lately.

'You're thinking about her, aren't you?' Hecat repeated her question.

Sharp thought for a while before responding, setting aside the quill he still held in his right hand. What had he even wanted to write with it? He lifted his gaze and looked around. It was the time of day when his classroom was flooded with light, casting sharp shadows on tables, chairs, and cauldrons with warm rays through the low windows. This was usually his favourite time of day. The warmth of late summer light always gently settled on his weary bones, but today it brought a penetrating sense of a past he preferred to forget. He straightened up and tried to stretch his leg.

'You know I don't like talking about Scarborough...' he tried to deflect.

'I'm not talking about Helen.'

Sharp glanced at Hecat sideways. Hearing the name of his partner unsettled him even more than talking about the place where he had lost her.

'Then who are you talking about?'

Sharp already knew the answer, it was obvious, but he didn't want to admit that Dinah Hecat was right with every word, as she often was. At least not yet. He didn't want to give himself away so easily, although he knew it wasn't worth dodging Hecat's questions.

'I'm talking about our new colleague, of course.'

Sharp didn't return her gaze and didn't answer.

'So, I was right. Come on, I can't blame you. She's an incredibly intelligent, talented and considerate witch. A true Ravenclaw. We both know you haven't been the same since she showed up here. Just like you weren't the same when she disappeared from here. I see how you look at her... and how you try to resist it.'

Her words left a gentle pain in his chest. There was no point denying what she knew anyway. She already knew the answer to her question, and even if she didn't, she simply regarded his silence as consent.

'Is it that obvious?' he finally admitted.

The expression in Hecat's eyes softened a bit as she observed with satisfaction how the imposing, intimidating wizard in front of her attempted to open up.

'When do you plan on talking to her about it?' she asked.

'Is that supposed to be a joke? I might as well request a transfer if she ever found out.'

'Do you really think she would react that way?' Hecat retorted.

Sharp snorted, but he knew his colleague was right. Since Elaine had returned, he had become aware of how much the thought tormented him that he would never feel the gentle touch of a hand on his own or the quiet warmth of a tender embrace again. Since the accident, he had tried to lock away any emotion that could make him vulnerable. But now, he repeatedly noticed how much he wished he could lean on a shoulder one more time and be carried away by gentle closeness.