LOST | Haerin x Reader

XL

Narrator

After what Y/n viewed as a tiring game of tug-of-war among surrogate sisters, Seulgi managed to take Y/n out for a private meal.

"You know you're just enabling her behavior. She should learn healthy coping mechanisms and healthy relationship boundaries," Seulgi was trying to give Y/n some advice...

But to Y/n, it sounded more like scolding.

"She was fine. She did learn all those things when she was taken away from me. It's just that right now I don't know what's up with her," Y/n tried to explain.

"It could be that I triggered her," Seulgi sighed out.

"Yeah," Y/n didn't object.

After seeing how Haerin behaved with Seulgi, it didn't seem that far fetched that the pair was somehow unconsciously compensating for lack of older/younger sister.

"Anyway, I think it was sweet of you to bring that picture of your sister. I think it was a nice message.... Just wrong timing... Haerin doesn't seem to be feeling well lately," Y/n gave Seulgi a small smile.

"It's funny really. I think it was more for me than for her. I think I just wanted to remember all the good times I had with my sister," Seulgi returned a sad smile.

"The more time that goes by, the less guilty I feel and the less I remember about her... I just want to remember myself as a good sister... a good sister who made a mistake... but never stopped loving my little sister," Seulgi tried to hold back a few tears.

Y/n picked up on Seulgi's unusual mood and sympathized a little.

Y/n understood what it was like to lose someone so sudden and have no chance to amend things. All you could do was try to remember the good things, while the bad things tried to drag you down in the background.

"So, do you have any more pictures of her?" Y/n tried to follow Seulgi's lead.

"Your sister, you know?"

- Haerin POV -

After an exhausting two hours of crying, Y/n ran in through the front door. I barely had any time to process what was going on when Y/n just randomly started going through some old photo album grandma had left behind.

I wiped away my tears and sniffled to prevent my boogers from coming out.

I hated that Seulgi-nim had won earlier, but kitten had kept me company so I don't think it was as bad as Y/n was used to.

"Oh my god," Y/n suddenly gasped.

"What is it?" I sniffled as I pulled kitten off me.

"Nothing!" Y/n abruptly shut the photo album and put it away.

- Y/N POV -

While Seulgi was showing me more pictures of her little sister, I started to feel a bit wary about things.

I thought it was cute that Sunbae had taken many digital pictures of old photographs of her little sister.

It really seemed like she was trying to not forget.

Although, I could tell a part of her wanted to.

Seulgi seemed just like Haerin in that way. Always remembering but wishing they didn't.

"This one is my favorite. It's a famous tourist spot. She was so cute that day," Seulgi said with tears in her eyes.

My eyes went wide the second I saw that picture.

Just as soon as my time with Seulgi ended, I ran home. I needed to verify something. I needed to make sure I wasn't going crazy.

"What is it?" Haerin asked.

I didn't even realize that I had gotten home.

"Nothing!" I panicked.

"No, what is it?" Haerin insisted.

"Haha, it's just a picture of us at that famous temple by grandma's hometown," I awkwardly responded.

I wasn't lying though.

"Oh, yeah! We took that picture not long after meeting," Haerin giggled and threw herself at me.

"Yeah," I exhaled out.

"But why are you looking at that?" Haerin snuggled into my chest.

It didn't take long before the kitten started to mimic its owner.

"Oh, Sunbae told me it was a famous touring spot. She showed me a picture of herself at the location and I was just curious to see if we had been to the same place," I nervously chuckled.

"Ahhh~!" Haerin giggled.

She seemed to be in a much better mood than how I left her. So, I was really relieved.

I wasn't lying about that things either.

Seulgi had shown me a picture of her and her little sister at the temple near grandma's hometown.

Usually, I didn't care about pictures like that. People took pictures everywhere and it was normal for most people in the country to take multiple pictures in their lifetime at famous temples... but that picture was different...

It was so different that I lied to Sunbae and said... "Could I take a picture of your picture? You look so cute in it!"

In reality, I wanted to take a picture to reference it to grandma's old pictures.

Seulgi's little sister looked just like Haerin.

The two pictures were even taken just a few months apart from each other.

Near the time when we found Kang Haerin.

Around that time, grandma did everything to make Haerin feel better. She took us to her hometown. She bought us a lot of toys and took us traveling around the country.

I think grandma was also doing that because she knew she was getting old and tired. I think she wanted Haerin to have good memories...

Even if they were tainted with bitter feelings.

"I remember that was the first time you kissed me!" Haerin suddenly started laughing.

I furrowed my brows in confusion.

"I don't remember that!" I genuinely meant it.

I had no idea what she was talking about.

"Yeah! You were upset because some pigeon stole your ice cream and you were crying. Grandma tried to take a picture of us but you didn't want to, so she forced you to kiss my cheek!" Haerin thought it was the funniest thing ever.

I vaguely remembered what she was talking about and smiled.

It was always interesting to me what we ended up remembering.

Sometimes it could be something that meant so much and sometimes it could be something that hurt so much.

Either way, I think our memories shaped us.

"All I remember is that you pushed me away because I had boogers on my cheek!" I teased.

"Eww, yeah. You were so snotty back then. I think you probably cried more than I did!" Haerin teased.

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