My Heart on Your Sleeve - Starker

My Heart on Your Sleeve

Tony had accepted long ago that he had no soulmate. In his twenties, he had seen it as a blessing; he was able to be with whomever he wanted without any guilt looming over him. He sat comfortably on his cushy throne as the hottest bachelor, gracing the pages of tabloids year after year.

When the subject was inevitably brought up in interviews, Tony would make the cheeky comment that his lack of mark was the universe deeming him untamable, like some wild stallion. He dreaded the day he’d eventually get paired as he knew it would put an end to his playboy days. While the public revered (or tolerated, depending on who you’re asking) his antics, he knew that if he gained his mark, they would turn on him if it was discovered that he fell into bed with anyone other than his soulmate.

As he grew older, his feelings on soulmates evolved. Waking up to find a soulmark on his forearm turned from a dreaded nightmare into a longing dream. By the time his forties rolled around and he began to play with the idea of settling down, he realized how challenging it would be to ever have a future with someone when they weren’t his soulmate. Realistically, his only options were the unfortunate individuals whose soulmates had died at some point in their time.

While once upon a time, he had believed the universe was giving him the gift of freedom; now, he realized that the hand he had been dealt was actually a curse.

~*~

In the years leading up to the boy’s 18th birthday, had Tony ever once thought that he would be Peter Parker’s soulmate? Heavens no.

Had Tony dreamed a life where he was Peter’s soulmate? Although he had no intentions of admitting it, absolutely.

But it was purely a work of fiction; it wasn’t real. There was no feasible scenario where the clock would strike midnight and a matching mark would appear on their forearms. Tony would never let himself indulge in that type of ridiculous notion. He would be setting himself up for disappointment if he let even a sliver of his consciousness think it could be possible. He knew that would hurt greater than the ache he currently felt each and every time he was reminded that Peter was turning 18.

If someone made mention of soulmarks to Peter in Tony’s presence, he could feel his heart constrict like crumpling up a ball of newspaper.  

To him, Peter getting a soulmark would mean the demise of their relationship. Maybe not at first and not all at once, but as soon as the boy met his soulmate it was only a matter of time before he started to drift away. The late-night lab sessions would grow few and far between… The movies nights would likely stop altogether. Or even worse; Peter would insist on bringing his soulmate along and Tony would be forced to witness everything he had ever wanted but knew he could never have.

Although he dreaded the day, he made sure to foot the bill for however extravagant of a party Peter wanted. In true Parker fashion, the boy had elected for a far humbler affair with only his aunt, his two friends, and the other Avengers present.

Tony’s mind was frantic as the countdown to midnight began. He attempted to bargain with a god he didn’t believe in, desperate for more time. Maybe Peter would be older than his soulmate and they would have a few years left?

Or better yet, perhaps the universe would find him as worthless as it had found Tony and not give the boy a soulmate at all. That way, the boy would never be compelled by nature to leave his side.

No. His stomach soured at that idea. He knew he didn’t mean that. The thing he wanted most in the world was for Peter to be happy, even if that meant a future where he left the older man behind.

Besides, no universe could be that cruel to a boy that pure and good hearted.

The moment the clock struck midnight and Tony felt a searing heat on his forearm beneath the layers of his bespoke suit, he exhaled the breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding.