Dear professor

Chapter 4

                           I will not leave.

The car ride home felt like hours. Ivan stayed quiet and so did it.
Looking out the window I just got this sudden feeling of pure sadness.
What if it's not just him?
What if no one ever loves me.. I get why he pushes himself away from me but why doesn't he at least talk to me.
I'm not a child I can keep a secret. Sometimes..
I just want him to tell me he at least feels something between us. To feel what I felt.

                       Ivan's prospective

The night creeps in and the sky turns dark. I'm sitting here in my car driving a teenager that thinks she's in love with me home. She doesn't know me she doesn't understand me,  why does she think I'm the one for her. It's been 3 days she needs to calm herself I can't entertain her forever. I need to maintain a student teacher relationship with her nothing more.
She can't think this is normal. Has she done this before? Tried to get with one of her teachers. What is this a game to her?. It's not that I don't find her attractive. She's a very pretty. Exceptional girl. I just can't bring myself to look at her as anymore than a child.
Yes I did want to kiss her but it was just a spur of the moment. What I said was very impulsive and Stupid. I need to keep myself together, I will not let this girl get to me.
As I look over at her just taking a quick glance I see she's looking out the window.
Her spark she normally has in her eyes seems to be gone. Her eyes seem dull and cold.
I can't help but think to myself that I've already ruined her.
I want to call out her name. I do.
I want her to talk to me like the first day we met. But if being friends means she will just continue to like me even more. I should keep my distance.
I hate this.
Looking at her even makes my heart stop.
She's like a slow burning campfire And I'm the rain that put her out. I'm really nothing good for her can't she see that.
I take a deep breath in and out and Get all of my thoughts Together neatly in my mind. As I pull up infront of her house her head lifts up. She looks out the window as if she's waiting for something. She hesitates to get out of my car for a few seconds until she does.
As she steps out A few sticks fallen from trees break beneath her making a crackling sound. I look down to see a Bruise peeking out of the back of her inner thigh. "Just a fall" yeah sure it was.
She closes the door But instead of heading to her front door she crosses paths and walks across the street my eyes follow her in confusion as she makes her way to my front porch and just sits there.
There's no way she's doing this right now.
  
                 Josephine's prospective

I sit on his porch and watch as he takes his car into the rocky driveway.. I then watch as he gets out of his car and fuck. He looks so good even trying to be somewhat mad at him. He always looked so proper, after all day his shirt had not one wrinkle. His wrist watch Shining and reflecting from the car light.
He takes my book bag in his hands and walks straight past me as if I wasn't there. He left his door open, I wait a moment then decide to go in. I look around at the familiar place.
I close his front door locking it then I follow him upstairs. He stops at the guest bedroom I had stayed in before. I stood behind him as he put my book bag down. " sit Josephine" he said in a cold tone. I felt no comfort in the way he said my name, So I did exactly what he said. I walked over to the bed and sat in front of him.. for a second he just stood there, he looked serious and it was making my nerves, my body nervously shaking. I put my head down not wanting to see him looking at me.
"Josephine.. you are my student" he breathes in "I know we've had this somewhat 'Friendship' these past few days. But please know this could really ruin both me and you.. I don't want this for us. For you Josephine" he breathes out.
He looks at me waiting for a response.
I look back at him my eyes going from his to his lips. Not sure what to say I just blurted out the first thing that comes to mind. "I.. don't care what other people think.  I'm not a child, and this will not ruin me whatsoever..I just want to be with you Mr. Fisher".. Yeah uhm such a great response huh? I feel really stupid after that. He just doesn't want me and I can't wrap myself around it.
I break eye contact and he kneels down looking up at me.
God did he look like a fucking angel from here.
His gray eyes staring up at me. Fuck.
My phone laying  beside me on the bed starts to ring. Both of our eyes immediately jump to my phone. As I'm going to pick it up Ivan takes it out of my hand tossing it to the side.

"Josephine. Look at me" His voice rings louder than ever before and my eyes jump to him.
"I will ruin you". With those words my heart skipped a beat.
What does he mean? Ruin me.
I just continue looking down at him.
His hands trace my thighs.
I feel heat starting to form between my legs.
" Josey.." The new use of my nickname really startled me.
His hands trail farther up my thighs
My body completely frozen just watch him as he unzips my shorts. "Do you want this?" He asks while looking down at my thighs then looking back up at me.
I nod my head motioning yes, he takes his hand off of me, getting off of his knees he towers over me. I fall back onto the bed while he hovers over me "Words princess"
My heart skips a beat and it's hard to get my words out "y..yes" I say. My voice cracking.
Ivan let's put a chuckle and a smirk
"Lift up" he says wanting Me to lift my waist up and I do so and with that he pulls my shorts down revealing my black laced panties.
God who knew this would be so embarrassing.
I watch as his hand traces the lining of my Panties. "Ivan.." my words stumble out.
"Hmm sweetheart?" He asks teasingly
"Is there something you want me to do?" he follows up.. I throw my head back not being able to get the words out. His hand continues chasing around the lining. I gasp as he pulls them aside and feels around rubbing his fingers against me. "This is wrong." I say practically moaning out.
"Mm..? Really you think that now"
"It's a little too late to rethink this hunny we are stuck." He lets a finger inside of me when saying this. I Gasp loudly at the Quick actions
Fuck this feels good.
My body clenching around his fingers as he moves them around inside me slowly pumping them through me.
"Ivan. More..please" I mutter out in an almost whisper.
"Oh but sweetheart this is wrong isn't it.. Maybe I should stop" he says teasingly.
My body heat increasing more and more by the second.
We make eye contact as he leans closer into me.
I see a smirk growing on his face and with that. He jerks his fingers out of me leaving me to moan loudly.
He breaks eye contact getting up.
"Goodnight Josephine" He says looking down at his watch. Then leaving the room.
The hell?
What was that.
He said all this shit about how we can't be together and how it's inappropriate just to be Inches deep inside of me a few minutes later. And how could he just leave as if that did not happen? Fuck he's so confusing.
He just left me here in my own mess.

This one's a bit short ☺️
1418 words 🫶🏽