Sober Thoughts

Another about you, god i wish you knew, that all these stories and poems, they're all about you, and about how we grew, and how our relationship was threw, and how what i've always said to you, the i love you is true.

You know who you are, that's the bad part, you read these words then go silent from afar, you stop caring, and try go far, it only takes a second to remember who you are.

So what if i'm not? what if i'm not everything you wanted me to be, what if you wanted someone stronger than me, taller than me? someone that can satisfy you quicker than me, oh and it's not from lesley, that's just something i want you to see.

It's kinda crazy that you cared when you pushed against the current, and lied to my face. Saying you were coming back but heard me plead for your embrace, was that something you couldn't face? how you left me to tie my own lace, on my hands and knees in the rain, or on the tree with a rope around my neck, trying to ease the pain.

You thought it was a guilt trip, but i didn't even care, the memories we shared, the emotions that were flared, how is this fair? i'll sit on this chair and fantasise so check this.

your getting through the breakup and i'm GOING through the breakup, your hearts against my chest, forehead pressed against my neck, because it was them moments and this one next, my mistakes were awful but so was your text, this isn't a game of chess.

You'll never find someone who loves you like he does, he meaning me, just have some trust, love never fails, if it fails it was never love, i failed us isles, never once understood, bipolar moments every time i think of us, i could be laughing and smiling then see a glimpse of us, then get hold of all these drugs, get them quickly for a buz, then forget.

I should drink text you, saying i miss you, and that there isn't nobody in this world like you, but i can't bring myself to the keyboard, i drown instead, my skin bled, my eyes turned red, i was lying in my bed, sleep drifts my head.

Inside your arms is warm, outside it starts to poor, is this what i was even alive for, for all women to look at me and think what the fuck is he looking for? i'm looking for care and looking for trust, gotta be quick before i catch this buzz at the end of this bud.

I'm too young for this, but if i had found the stuff i was looking for it wouldn't have got to this, all of this is bullshit, and you and me both know it, there's still time to make it right before i'm floating in the sky, controlling every sunset, so may u ask why, may you make it alright, your the only thing that makes it bright, and makes it fine, nothing is fine though.

Nothing matters in this world if you're not in it, no this poem isn't finished, fighting for my life and your sat not listening.

Moping around you is not even boring me, you didn't even fight for me, you just left me like nothing was gonna hurt me, please save me before your saying R.I.P , and the reason i'm telling you this is because the boy in this poem.. is me.

s o b e r ~ t h o u g h t s
merrillayce@gmail.com
enquiries and dms
29/12/2009 D.O.B

wattpad poems