Home life & school life were totally different for me. At home it was like a dark cloud was over my head. Negative energy flowed soon as you walked in the door, a sea of unhappiness. My mom Marie and her boyfriend Roy of 10+ years almost always argued. I don't think I ever witnessed a happy moment between the two, it was always drama filled. Roy acted like he was my dad, he liked to tell me what to do and expected me to listen to him. He thought that I should call him dad but he didn't take care of me and I knew my dad even though he wasn't actively in my life. My mom and dad went their separate ways when I was seven years old, at the time I didn't see it but it was for the best. The love they shared had died long before, they just tried to make it work for their child. Mom eventually got tired of pretending, she couldn't stay with him no matter how much money he threw at her. Even thought she loved and wanted the best for me she also wanted a life of her own. She wanted to be loved again and my dad did love her just not the way she wanted him to. She met Roy when I was six years old. He was her knight in shining armor, the happiness she was missing at home she found with him. For a whole year my mom went back and forth between two homes, ours and Roy's. Within that year she disrespected dad to the fullest by flaunting her relationship in his face. She would spend nights with Roy in the guestroom some nights either forgetting or not caring that dad was in the next room. He would complain but it fell on deaf ears, he eventually got tired and left. I didn't understand why at the time but as I look back I realize the reason he couldn't stay. I came to hate Roy with a passion as I grew up, he was the reason my family split up, he was the reason my mom didn't notice or care about me like she should. If it wasn't for him I would be loved. When I couldn't get the love I needed from home of course I looked for it from somewhere else. I looked for it anywhere I could, I started wilding out. I looked for it in man. I was seeing 3 guys who didn't care enough to ask my age at once. An hour glass shape so naturally my body and age wasn't matching. My momma always told me "that body of yours gone get you in trouble", I didn't believe her then but NOW...
