A Hatful of Love (A Timothee Chalamet fanfic)

A Wonky Greeting From Mr. Wonka

You were in the candy store purchasing chocolates for Mother's Day. As you waited in line, a very peculiar man came into the store. He was a young man- maybe early 20s- and he had a funny suit on. You couldn't help but chuckle at his sweaty appearance. He heard you laugh, and he looked at you. Y'all locked eyes for a moment before he broke into a grin. He grabbed his brown briefcase and climbed on top of the counter. He took a deep breath and yelled at the top of his lungs:
" LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! BOYS AND GIRLS! ...and other things, too. I AM WILLY WONKA- not anything less, not- well- maybe just a bit more. Anyways, quiet up and listen down! Wait, scratch that. Reverse it. (Actual quote from the Wonka movie and book) What I'm trying to say is, I am Willy Wonka, the man that will supply you with edible teacups, cotton candy clouds, and the most UNBEATABLE eatable you will EVER come across- CHOCOLATE!" He winked at you and you smiled.
"Care to try a Hoverchoc, Miss? Or Misses if you're married." You giggled.
"I'm not married yet, silly! I'm only 21!" Willy smiled.
"Really? You're 21? Well, I'm 22! We should get married!" You were taken aback. Mainly because he really was an attractive man, with his brown, bouncy curls, with his cute bunny teeth, with his quirky personality...
"Uh...I-....um..." you stammered. Willy looked at you. He was tall from a distance, but when he was right in front of you, you were actually a few inches taller than him- not very many, but just a few. he looked up at you and extended his hand out to you. In it, there was a little, tiny chocolate. It was in the shape of an egg. He smiled at you.
"Hoverchoc?" he asked. You know and took it from him. Your hand gently grazed his, and you realize that it was very soft and smooth. You gently peeled the chocolate it slipped it into your mouth. It had a rich, creamy texture, and it tasted of pure butterscotch. It was absolutely divine. You close your eyes for a minute before opening them again.
"Woah...Willy, that was amazing!" you exclaimed. Willy just laughed.
"Oh, you don't know the half of it, Misses- or Miss if you're single." As soon as he stop talking, you felt your feet gently leaving the ground.
"Willy, put me down!" Willy laughed.
"I'm not touching you." You looked around the store. No one was touching you, but everyone was staring at you at awe.
"S-she's...she's flying!" an elderly woman said. Everyone below you look like little ants. You had even reached the ceiling! Willy waved at you from below.
"Hi, Miss! Are you having fun up there?" he asked. You shook your head.
"No! I'm not! Please help me get down from here!" You yelled. Willy looked down at his feet.
"Oops...sorry, Miss," Willy mumbled sheepishly. You thrashed around in the air.
"What do you mean, "I'm sorry, Miss" ?! Get me down!" Willy looked remorseful.
"See, it's kind of embarrassing but...but..." You shrieked, making everyone in the store stare at you again.
"TELL ME!" you screamed. Willy laughed nervously.
"Relax...calm down...I'm just saying that I don't think it's gonna work for you because you're a girl..." he whispered.
"Willy Wonka, you'd better tell me how to get down from here right now!" Willy sighed.
"Fine." He cleared his throat.
"Well," he started in a British accent, "the fly must come out of the egg you ate and you...you must fart it out of your bum cheeks." You screamed louder than before.
"What?! Fart it out of my bum cheeks?! How?!" Willy shrugged.
"I dunno. Oh! Look at the time! I must go now! Bye, Miss!" Willy smiled, gave a tip of his hat, and ran off.