Human Incubators Inc.

Thank you all for choosing to tour our facilities. Incubators Inc. is a lively business making the rounds across the galaxy. As human have come to be known for their inherent breeding capabilities, many extraterrestrial beings have grown interested in their use as incubators for clutches and offspring. Incubators Inc. was founded on the grounds of ethical treatment of humans to ensure their health and safety during the trying months of pregnancy. Our goal is to keep all specimen as stress-free and happy as possible as research has shown the increase in human "happy hormones" leads to healthier pregnancies.

Before we get into the humans treatment at our facilities, we'd like to assure you that humans are not an advanced species and have rather limited brain activity — as will be shown later. You'll find out methods are done to minimize panic among the human populus as well as individual specimens. I'm sure we've all heard of the many attempts at human contact over the years that lead to mass hysteria and threats of war. With our patented methods, no human will discover their incubator status or put your clutch at risk.

To begin the tour, we start with Level 1: The Simulated Office Environment

Humans are very apt to the office environment. Research shows they love to feel as though they're not only achieving something, but achieving something while sitting down for hours on end. We first send out recruiting specialists to find and, well, recruit a human with the characteristics needed for our training. You see, some humans are a bit more "aware" than most and tend to reject our attempts at training. If we do get one such human on accident, you can trust we have our ways of dealing with it.

Once we've found a human to hire — indeed, all humans that work for us are compensated monetarily — we bring them in for an "interview". Using holographic technology, we ensure that any human that comes into the office will be unaware of our other worldly origins. The interview is not only meant to test their aptitude for our training program, but also to help align their mind for this generous employment opportunity.

As you can see, we have an interview going on right now:

A human male sits limp in an office chair. An advanced piece of head gear covers the upper half of his face. They're completely relaxed, oblivious to the world around them.

"According to your porn history, you enjoy being [BRED], [HELD DOWN], [GAPING]. Is that correct?"

The male, entranced at the spiral covering his eyes, obediently answers.

"Yes."

A pleasant ding rings through his ears. He moans at the affirmation he's done something good.

This human will need some altering before it can become a good incubator, but that's for later. Right now, we just need some information and it's consent to work here.

Moving along, you'll see what "training" looks like,

Rows upon rows of humans sit in cubicles looking straight at their computers, sitting upright as if diligently working. Looking closer, none of them are typing or doing anything at all. Each stares ahead, blankly at a spinning image of a spiral on the screen while listening languidly to a voice in their headphones.

These humans are going through Phase 1 of training. Now that we know their interests and quirks, we'll begin retraining the mind to solely wish to work for us. To be good worker. The best worker they can be, if you will.

This is what I meant earlier when I said human brains are not that advanced. Their minds can be so easily manipulated as to become enamored by a spiral. Though we also offer other visuals, a swinging pendant or ticking clock are some other imagery humans adore.