The Ghosts of Us

Opening

And so... there he was.

As the crowd swallowed me the swelling of the orchestra was all that was preventing my panic attack.. then a familiar melody from a guitar I once knew. I would hold it uncomfortably with his arms wrapped around me, playing every note wrong but I could've never been more happy than in that moment. Surely this can't be real.

A spotlight on one of his old friends shines bright. He looks like the star he was born to be. We always knew it. The blue light shone so bright that even the dust particles in the air were visible. God, this was such a terrible idea, why did I come here. A stupid momentary thought full of maybes and what ifs, why did I do this to myself? I am grateful I managed to get as close as I did to the stage however the crowds of women screaming for them is so overwhelming. I now understand how the boyfriends they pulled along with them felt. I almost sympathised with them. God that used to be him, although he never looked quite as disappointed to be there with me, he had a way of finding comfort in wherever he went.

Then the words of the song reach me and I know he wrote them, there's no way he didn't. The melody I had heard all those years ago was even more beautiful now with all of the decorum. How did he remember all of these little details... of me.

My coffee cup from Gramps.. I was sure I had lost it in the move.. he had it all along?

Even though all of these words came from Leo's mouth all I could hear was Caleb's voice. A voice I had searched my dreams to recover for years. The sadness of the song brings a lump to my throat and leaves a pit in my stomach weighing my heart down. Then the blue light moves on the count of 3 little droplets in the music, the blue light I would never live to forget. The stage is dark and then.. it finds him. Caleb.... My... no not my Caleb. Its been far too long of a time to call him that.

God, he's just as beautiful now as he was then. Age suits him. His stylist clearly knows what she's doing, his suit pants and sparkling jacket are dazzling but I cant help to notice one thing, his t shirt. Oh this is so him, he always lived in graphic tees, it was his thing and honestly I loved it. Even when we had to go to my cousin's wedding and I had to fight him to wear a suit I loved his authenticity. Wait.... that t-shirt. It was just like mine!